Anyone who's seen my posts on manga pre-sub FAKKU! knows how much I don't like, no, hate NTR, but this one woman I've met makes me want to commit Netori.
We met while playing TF2, you know, the whole "friend-listing people you like playing with" thing, so I looked over her profile and left her a message wishing her luck in the career she wants to pursue.
Well, after that, we started talking, and I found out more about her, how beautiful she is, how she's the sweetest thing I've ever met, and how she has the voice of an angel.
She seems perfect, right?
Well, that's where my hypocrisy began.
There's three problems, and two of them're linked:
1. She lives a state over.
2. She has a boyfriend.
3. I know nothing about 2 except that he's a med student, while I'm a worthless NEET.
You can see my dilemma here, right?
The one gal who actually likes how I look and who I am is the only woman I've ever considered purposefully compromising my morals for.
I mean, she fits literally everything I've looked for in a wife since I was 5, so that's a hellova long list, and not a thing's missing, so meeting her felt like fate finally gave me a perfect hand, and now all I have to do is change out the right cards to find my chance at happiness.
Just because I have these deep feelings for her, it doesn't mean I won't regret what I'm wanting to do, in fact, it makes me afraid to make things worse for her, because she might be happy with this guy, and I'm just causing trouble for her, but, no matter how much I question it, it still feels like I'm meant to be with her, y'know?
Like some force is pulling us closer and closer together, and it's my choice whether to keep going or pull away.
I'm mainly wanting to go as far as I can until I cross the line, but I don't know what I'll do when I get that far.
The dilemma is whether I should risk her being happy with this guy to be selfish and try to make her happy myself.
I know I'd be able to make her happy, but he'd be more likely to be able to support her monetarily, so I'm at war with myself over a plethora of questions ringing through my mind.
It's Love vs. Morals, and I think I know what I'm going to do, but it doesn't make me happy to do it, but if it can help her be happy, I don't care how I feel afterwards. ^.^