Is It the Right Time to Make a Next Move?

Although I already have three waifus, Shinobu, Nodoka and Haruna, by my side, a girl in reality has captured my attention, prompting me to seek advice from my fellow Fakku members.

As most of you may have known, I started working on a full-time basis recently. The female whom I am interested in is just as new to the company as I am, though it took me 3 meetings to obtain her mobile phone number (earlier this week), since both us belong to different departments.

I am pondering as to whether I should ask her out for dinner this weekend, provided she is not scheduled for work in the evening. However, I am afraid I may be rushing things, since we have only spoken face-to-face for a bit, with some messages over the phone thrown in. Furthermore, I am not sure if she is already attached. There is a group activity for new employees coming up soon; if my attempt at asking her out this weekend fails miserably, things will most likely be awkward the next time we meet.

As such, what should I do? Muster my courage to ask her out for a meal this weekend or wait a little longer?

All advice are welcomed and appreciated.

In my opinion, wait a little while, try to talk to her when taking lunch breaks. I suggest asking her for dinner after you know quite a bit about her. And make sure she's still single without a boyfriend.

I'm currently using this tactic at the girl I like, and it's slowly working. The problem with my target is, she's Androphobic (touching only) :roll:


BTW, I'm surprised that you have love problems. :wink:

not now,considering that you only have spoken with her for a bit.

talk to her casually more,and read her after you think you talked to her enough to be able to do so.

is she attentive/looks happy/active when she talk to you?
is she starting a lot of convo with you?
if it's so,go for the offensive.

if she isn't,hold your horses.

i hope this could be useful for you.

okay,now hand over one of your waifus for my advice

In my opinion, I'd get in some more conversations and mingling time before going in for the kill, that is the dinner. You've got nothing to lose.

Unfortunately, I won't be able to have lunch with her on normal days since our offices are located at different places. In addition, I am not sure how I can go about asking whether she has a boyfriend without revealing my interest in her. *sweats*

Females are different from one another in their own unique way, so it is inevitable that I encounter problems too. :D



She claims to have noticed me once even though I did not see her around. As for conversations, she is always smiling whenever I see her, though it could be her natural friendliness with others. When I did ask her whether she should get back to work, she said she had some time left on her break. Are they good signs, or am I thinking too much?



Would it better if I told her I am dropping around the area over the weekend for dinner, and perhaps she would like to join me, instead of inviting her directly?

Try asking it indirectly, try to lure her to tell you that she does/doesn't have a boyfriend. Make a conversation topic that will be a sure-kill-bait for the answer. Can't think of any, will inform you when a idea pops up.

Well, this method works for me, and my target girl is now very open to me. :D And I still know that she doesn't have a boyfriend, because I "indirectly" controlled her to "break-up" with the recent one. ( :twisted: MWAHAHAHA)

... I'd invite her directly, but don't be too blunt about it. To say something like I'm dropping over at so-and-so place sounds casual which in the eyes of a woman might just be a pure social call, but for a person who doesn't want to rush things, I suppose you can do that.

I'd say, like g-money, ask her directly. 'You're nice, how about a date?' sounds generally better than 'I'm just randomly inviting you with actually not that much of interest, if you say no I might as well just ask that girl over there.'.

Just make sure your three waifus won't find out about her.

hmmm,nice girl,i see.
time to go stalker and watch her behavior to other guys?

see if she do that only to you.if yes,bam.
if she's like that to everybody,then take it slowly.

Thanks for the advice people!

I asked her out in a less direct manner via messaging and received the following reply:

She said she would like too, but already has plans for the night, though she did add a "maybe another time?" question, with a ":)" at the back.

Since I am not too good at interpreting females and their words/actions, apart from that of mai waifus, does that mean there is an underlying message trying to inform me she isn't interested, or does she mean what she actually says? Now I am a little confused, and I don't want to be too excited lest my happiness is in vain. We did continue to converse a little over phone messaging before she had to start work...

You could interpret it as "I'd LOVE to see you, but it's something really important NOT regarding another guy I have to do." but also as "Maybe another time, I have more important things to do, like, watching TV.". But I'd say the part with "she'd like to" sounds good so far, though the final meaning of it depends on her character. Feed me more information!

I'd say just ask her out another time (Not like there are that much other options.), I'd suggest a date a few days ahead (You could also be successful with spontaneity. "What about [Insert activity] in about... right now?") but that depends on your work schedule, I think. Just don't be too intrusive (Or is it obtrusive? My dictionary abondoned me there.) about it, and everything will be fine.

That smiley icon kinda set off my relationship-possible alarm, but I wouldn't take it to heart. Like nacho, I'd suggest another date, perhaps a more direct method such as talking to her in her break time or when you see each other in building. (I suppose it's too late, but this kind of thing in my opinion should never be done over a medium but rather face-to-face.)

We really need a girl's opinion here. Buncha of horny and single guys in my eyes (as I'm one of them) doesn't strike me as reliable, even if we all heard of or seen this sorta thing happen.

Give her a Rufie and take it from there.

How less directly did you ask her?
It all depends on your question in the end. From what I've gathered though she seems interested at least a bit women don't bother being friendly and opening doors for more activities with guys they don't bother with. Now you need to ask yourself does she sees you as a friend or a possible boyfriend candidate?

In my opinion once you've answered that question it's time to be direct and be agressive! Direct approachs are always the best imo.

The good news: I may be able to have dinner with her tomorrow night.

The bad news: Curiosity killed the cat. Doing a search for her blog, I found out that she has a boyfriend, although he is currently not in the local area.

I am feeling quite confused and demoralized right now, with some disappointment thrown in.

Since she has said nothing about being attached, should I pretend as if I know nothing and continue progressing slowly? Then again, the information may not be reliable as the most recent update was a couple of months back.

On the other hand, if she is indeed attached, some of my friends encouraged me not to give up that easily as "all is fair in love and war". However, it would seem unethical to come between a couple. Am I being selfish to hope that she is currently single so that I continue going after her?

I am currently quite lost, caught between my morals and heart desires. More than ever before, I definitely need to hear from you people...

1. DO NOT GIVE UP. Now like I said in a previous post as long as you are not seen as a pure FRIEND then anything goes. She might feel depressed because her relationship is not going well or like you said since her page hasn't been updated in a while she could be single.

2. Now is the time to be agressive and take a stand. You should try to reinforce your relationship with her and create bonds especially over dinner keep the conversation going and try to find out if she is taken by anyone.

3. I see nothing wrong in trying to make the person you love; fall in love with you. If she does it just means the best man won. Period. The only women that should always be off in the guys code of honor is friends girlfriends; sisters and mothers that's it. Everything else anything goes.

Lastly just DON'T GIVE UP!

Thanks for the advice Zellgadus. An earlier nap cleared my mind.

The dinner date scheduled later this evening has been cancelled/postponed. Although she did not provide any reason, I kind of expected it. I guess she is just too nice to reject me outright.

Anyway, I have decided to be friends with her for now. Some of you may think I am quitting too easily, but I believe I should slow down a gear or two, based on her response, as well as my own principles. The possibility is very low, but who knows, the both of us may be able to get together in the future.

In addition, I feel apologetic towards those of you who have advised me in matters of the heart. I somehow feel that your respective replies and support has gone down the drain. Nonetheless, I am back on my feet, vowing to return, stronger than ever before, not just for my own sake, but also for the concern most of you have shown.

It sure has been a rollercoaster ride for the last two weeks.

Ah well, there's plenty of other fish in the sea. Since she's got a boyfriend, that kinda makes everything moot. (If that piece of info is real... you never know what people lie about on the net.)

What the hell's up with that, gambler? Making us all now worry about you, and stuff.

My advice: Make her jealous. Use your three waifus to show her what she's missing. Oh wait. No. Better don't. Well, I guess there's not much else to do than to just wait and see how things will turn out.



We've got such a great saying in german regarding such a matter. It basically comes down to: There is no sole person to blame regarding relationships.

Which is precisely why I feel apologetic towards you people. :)

Yes, I agree that relationships are complicated with no clear right or wrong...