Childhood and Memories.

Just wanting to know people's thoughts on having memories in their childhood and how it affects them to this day. Is having good early memories essential to being well, not so messed up in the future? Or having memories in general, whether good or bad?

It's a bit hard for me to articulate, since I suffer from Amnesia and memory problems in general, but having no memories of my past feels like I'm missing a huge chunk of myself and has scarred me pretty badly emotionally and whatnot. I pretty much have to live in the present.

I'd imagine people with bad memories of their past would probably make them more depressive than usual but for me, just knowing would be nice. Not knowing at all feels wrong.

My apologies if my post is confusing, it's rather hard to talk about something you don't understand that well.

My childhood was decent and also abusive .... but it taught me the good and bad, thus making me become a wise person when it comes to life.

I cannot recall many memories of the past, so pretty much I am likely to forget about it after 4-5 years, but it isn't a bad thing, sometimes it is a good thing to forget about the dark past and head on into a bright future.

The words you've said made me think about this video. Of course, I can understand what you're trying to ask OP. Well, sometimes people think about their pasts to bring back the nostalgic feelings they felt at that time, no matter good or bad. It is normal for people to feel depressed just thinking about the past. But sometimes, people just don't want to remember some things because they are afraid that they might get emotionally hurt. Ignorance is bliss in this case.

I can't really think of any good memories of my childhood though. If I were to try thinking about the past, normally it hurts because just thinking about a certain memory could sometimes lead you to remembering probably a worse kind of memory you wish you could've forgotten. But then, the past is the past. If you remember your older memories and feel bad about it, don't feel bad. With the present time constantly changing, you too should change into the kind of person you strive to be. And Court Jester is right, you should forget about the dark parts of your past and aim for a brighter future.

i have gaps in my childhood so i can't tell if it's affected me positively or negatively but i can only assume that repressed memories must lead to good things.

I believe that childhood is about temperance. If a child experiences only suffering, horrific cautionary tales without any contrasting inspirational ones, constant disappointment and flippant disregard of their interests, a child will grow up to be me. Neurotic, self-sabotaging, and paralyzingly paranoid.

If I was hugged more often, met more nice people, and got to do ANY fun kid things, I probably wouldn't have ended up so thoroughly fucked in the head.

Unlike most here, my childhood has been decent. My mom was kind and lenient, but strict when she needed to be. A bit stricter with me than she needed to be at times, though. It kinda hit the point where I decided to ultimately stop listening to her when she was angry and just give generic responses. She also didn't really mind me doing what I wanted so long as it doesn't affect me negatively and I did what I needed to do beforehand. Although she's over-protective.

My other parent has been gone from my life for a rather long time, allowing me to adapt. I have talked to them a few times recently, but I'm unable to identify any sort of motive or what type of person they are. I generally do not treat them as a parent, really.

Most of my problems came from school, but I managed to repress most of my memories of those places. Although I'm still recovering from that hellhole doubling my hours of sleep from six to twelve.

My childhood? I guess I could some it up in just one word: Sheltered. But me, being me, I don't stop at one word XD My mother was both deeply religious and highly authoritarian. And i'm not talking 9:00pm curfews and time limits on how much tv i could watch :P I mean if there was something she simply didn't like (ie, a tv show or anything, really) it wasn't allowed in the house. Simple things like Wallace and Gromit were banned under our roof. And having friends over? Don't make me laugh! Among other things, I had a very sheltered and clueless childhood, and as a result, I didn't so much as go on a date, or even just go out with friends until I was 17. That being said, I was never exposed to violence or abuse of any kind, but most of childhood was spent either studying, or sulking about not being able to have fun XD

I was a stupid fuck as a kid, did things I regret... Lots and lots of thing. I've used my childhood to learn. I think it's made me a better person in a way, but also having those regrets, it is a burden

Well, you do have a memory that spans around a week long so it's not surprising you don't remember your childhood.

However it's not always bad that you have memory loss; there are quite a few things from my earlier years that I would have liked to forget. But I suppose that goes with the saying "You don't know what you have till it's gone" right?

I'll provide some different insight since I know you better than most other people here: However much you think you are less of a person due to your lack of memory in my eyes it hasn't taken away from the person you have become. You're a nice person and I can think of tons of times where you go out of your way to help your friends, and above all else you like dealing with my shit when it's rather difficult to do.

Ultimately I think it's extremely important to realise that even though you don't remember much of your childhood the lessons that every human being should learn during those development years are subconsciously ingrained in your brain, and the evidence of that is blatantly clear.

As a kid, I did not know the difference between a bully and a friend, So my only friends as a kid were bullies.
I got hit a teased alot, I didn't tell anybody cause I thought they were my friends.
As a kid, I used to sit anywhere where there was nobody else and just think to myself.

I was also kinda a jerk as a kid, Now I try my best to be as polite as possable.

Generally I don't think my childhood had a really big influence on who I am today, but it's not like it didn't have any influence either.

The biggest point would probably be my family, which to put it frankly, was not composed of very good people until I grew up. My parents try, but I still hold a lot of grudges against them since that time, and they have a lot of things they aren't proud from...which is funny, because that was the exact case with their childhood. So I never really came to regard family as "pillar of strength" or someone that is particulary close to me. They're important people, but not anymore then my friends.

The other things would be faith. When I was small I hard this one priest (pretty old guy by then) saying that ultimately, God doesn't give a dammn about whether you go to Church or not. In fact, if you don't really believe in God, then don't go there in the first place. It's better to be honest, and if God really exists, then he would appreciate your honesty more then your forced prayers.

Being raised in hardline Catholic society, that was a big "Wham" at the time for me.

Hmhm, I barely remember anything from my early childhood either so I dunno. I suppose if I could choose I would prefer being able to remember things my family told me I did when I was little, but I cannot so that's that for me. So I will not comment if its good having memories even if they are bad, only people who have this experience should do that.

Feel like a bit of you is missing? Just having that thirst to know what actually happened? Perhaps puzzle pieces missing to what you're like now?

Not really sure, what I would miss most may be not knowing for sure if the stories my family tells me how I was when I was little are true or exaggerated.
But just as I think that, I remember how even if I had memories, they would still be inaccurate as nostalgia and age along with my own perspective of the events would not be reliable either.

Still, I would indeed like to have memories even if they are imperfect and influenced by nostalgia. So yea, I can relate to the sensation of feeling a piece of me is missing, but things could be worse.

My childhood was rather a blur of confusion and frustration. I vividly remember how I was spoiled to death and was allowed to develope without any discipline. My father and mother had a divorce when I was... About 2, and I grew up with a working, single mother. She was a hardworking, smart woman, so undoubtedly, she threw herself completely into work/passion. She was and still a businesswoman, and she was too good at what she was doing, so she never had to consider stopping. I encountered scorns and arrogant empathy from people around me and I couldn't fully understand that. I was always frustrated with everybody and everything because I never could have understand why people were doing such things to me, and I did not know how to express my emotions. I stuffed myself with chocolate, soft drinks and junk food because a proper meal was nowhere to be found (you could tell that I was morbidly obese).

I was so much of a mess. Nobody would have wanted to play with me, to interact with me, not even to look at me. The only person that could have love me is my mother, and she was too busy at work to proper interact with me (when I'm off to school, she would still be in bed and when I'm asleep, she would come home. It's like living with a ghost). I wasn't aware of myself and my terrible personalities, therefore, more frustrations.

My mother was under alot of pressure due to her work and I was constantly abused because of her pressures. I remember times where she pushed me through the 2nd floor windows, tried stabbing me with pointy objects and bash my head with the metal end of the belt. She made me kneel and she would repeatedly bash my head with her highheels. I evidently became unconscious and soak the floor with blood. I woke up in a pool of blood and my mother dead drunk in a bar. There were many more tantrums but the most significant were when my mother would actually abuse me until I fainted. I remember how it was painful to sit on a chair because my entire thighs were bruised black because of her beatings. I remember how terrifying her screaming and cursing were. I remember how I cried until I could no longer create a sound.

Not until when my mother dated my step-father that I was given a chance to change. I was about 8, then, and every memories from then on was extremely vivid. He was an incredibly decent, neat and clarified person. He was and still is my hero. He taught me, shaped me into an actual human being. I felt like I've never really know how to live until he came into my life. I've excelled dramatically at everything. I gained friends, excellent grades and developed in creating visual arts.

I owed my step-father my currently life. (This part is gagged with egotistic yapping, I'm sorry LOL) I am now adored at school, by teachers and peers. My characters and qualities comes in a completely different class than before. I'm... I'm so much different now. It's like that little spoiled brat died in a pit and my step-father made me out of clay. I couldn't have done this is my step father was so contrasting and determined, and obviously, kind. There is no doubt that my step father did a better job than my father could have.

Here's my deviantArt page, if you're interested. I've recently changed accounts so there aren't many posts and I'm on a hiatus, apparently LOL. If you do take the IBDP Course, you would know why I'm on a hiatus.

I do remember some childhood memories, but I think there should be a line drawn between memory as a set of facts (like the first memory I remember is being able to ride a bicycle) and the set of feelings (emotions as such - pains or pleasures or nostalgia for the ice-cream that tasted so good). I do remember facts and continue to accumulate them, but emotional part is progressively getting erased.

I would guess people mostly fond of emotional impact of their childhood (whether positive or negative) and that is what some might be missing, but all I remember is few emotions and a lot of facts. They do affect me sometimes (like smelling a familiar smell brings me back some 10-15 years and I day dream refining memories for some time, say), but generally, I prefer more present-oriented life with only recent facts and plans for future shape my mood.

After all, skills remain with you from day 1, apparently.