Teleological Sexual Interests

In my case, I find that, the longer one watches porn (for simplicity sake, the word porn will refer to porn, hentai and all related materials) the easier it gets to become interested in things one wasn't interested before. I think it's safe to assume this happens to most people as well. That being the case, there are quite a few questions I'd like to ask:

• 1. Do you know have fetishes that you didn't have when you started watching porn?
  2. If so, do you think exposure to porn made them or they existed all along?
  3. Do you think this gives some credit to the conservative views against porn?
  4. Have you ever tried to deny yourself any particular fetish?
  5. If so, did it work?
  6. Do you think it is possible to deny fetishes that way?

If you don't wanna answer the questions one by one (which you don't have to) the issue is basically this: if porn exposure can create new fetishes does that mean porn withdrawal can remove them?

1. Do you now have fetishes that you didn't have when you started watching porn?
Yes.

2. If so, do you think exposure to porn made them or they existed all along?
A bit of both. I think my actual sexualitys/personalitys development (current 22) is something co-current with the expansion of my fetishes but viewing certain porn definity contributed to this formation in an abstract hard to sum up way. Put another way. If I started watching porn at 30, I doubt I would develop too many new fetishes because my sexuality would already be largely formed. I could be wrong on this but there isnt really anyway to tell..

3. Do you think this gives some credit to the conservative views against porn? No.　I may like rape hentai but that does not mean I want to go out and rape people.
For someone to do such a thing, the problem is more than just porn and porn certainly should not take the blame. The problem is with the individual specifically who likely has psychological instabilities. The kids who do drive by shootings arent doing them because they saw it in gta alone, the cause is far more complicated than that or else every kid gta player would be doing the same.

4. Have you ever tried to deny yourself any particular fetish?
No, I try not to feel guilty about fapping to things. Just do what feels good. Though phrasing it as fetish is a bit complicated because while I have many porn fetishes most remain in fantasy and the fetishes I may act on/seek out in real life are quite a bit smaller. I like traps (some in rl even) but I dont think I would ever consider having sex with one.. So perhaps not raping people in real life could be considered denying myself a fetish because I enjoy lilith soft but I kind doubt it. Ive never even considered doing anything like that so how would this be a denial?

6. Do you think it is possible to deny fetishes that way?
I think one would still be arosed by these things regardless and fapping to them is largely harmless. Also, since Teleological generally indicates a progress, couldnt the development and discovery of fetishes through porn be considered a positive and formative thing? We need to stop attaching guilt and shame to sexuality and deviancy. Of course, some laws and governments like to charge people for victomless crimes so depending on the fap fetish and location in the world it might end up being harmful to you in a bullshit oppressive way.

This discussion is also a part justification for the whole nofap movement thingy. This post addresses all aspects of why it is largely pleceabo effect bull and this particular teleological view of porn unproven statistically and even if it is true irrelevant due to lack of correlation between porn and actual sexual behaviour > http://www.revscene.net/forums/669003-no-fap-challenge-20.html#post7992696 According to it, I am prolly just a kinky atypical individual.. Probably true.

You make quite a few good points, these two being the ones I want to address most. Another good one is your GTA example which clearly explains the situation and nothing else needs to be said about it.

Your answer to the second question is quite interesting and I hadn't thought about it. Looking back I do think that, even though I wasn't into those things as I am now, they seem to have existed back then, at least a shallow form of them.

As to the sixth one, I wasn't entirely sure about the word. It implies a progress that moves towards one goal (telos). With a positive view of this, it would mean sexual maturity as you have pointed out. The negative view would be that, maybe, it could lead to less than pleasant activities. And this is not an eufemism. I don't just mean the «bad stuff», spending way too much time with any kind of porn would count i.e. [mild] porn addiction. In this sense, I don't know if the end goal would be a good one.

Either way, I have no idea. To respond to the two cowards who gave negative votes before revealing their knowledge on the subject, I am not arguing that watching porn turns people into criminals. In fact, I agree with the rational view which is that the problem is deeper than that. I am also not suggesting people should lash themselves everytime they look at a particular type of porn. I am just wondering if it is possible to deny ourselves those things if we want to.

For example, the first porn stuff I watched was softcore foot fetish of the softest kind. I mean, even with a foot fetish it was boring. And at the time I thought: «If anyone were to see my history, it would be quite embarrassing.» But now, I couldn't care less about that because I have seen (and liked) stuff that would be way more difficult to explain. Nothing illegal and I still draw a line before quite a few people do (loli being an example) but still it makes me wonder... People here seem so defensive against it, I dunno why...

It's called "exploring." You don't walk into a restaurant for the first time and instantly know what the best meal on the menu is.
The moment you find out what porn is, you don't instantly know what your favorite thing is.




If porn was nicotine, yes.

It's not easy to remove a fetish. I don't think withdrawal helps either. Your fetish has already been formed. It's now deep in your brain. An exercise a lot of people find helpful is to look at a picture of their fetish, stare at it for quite some time and tell themselves it is not arousing at all. They keep doing this until they've seen pictures of their fetish enough for a lifetime; which makes the fetish now not-so-precious to their brain.

I've also seen other people grew over their fetishes as they get old, only to be replaced by new ones.

Besides, there's nothing wrong with fetishes as long as you don't hurt anybody. If anything fetishes make you more distinct.

People have a preference for things which can range from simple to odd. It’s okay to have an interest, but there are some things that can cross the line and should never be practiced (sex with children for instance), but such things have deeper issues then just a fetish. To stop a person’s fetish, depends on the person and how obsessive/compulsive their fetish is.

I look at fetishes like I look at ice cream. I love it and sometimes pig out on it, but I eventually take a break from too much of it and switch to something different. I enjoy a variety of ice cream!

It's not really a question of enjoying it or not, I think. It's not even about realizing it is healthy and pleasurable to explore them so you do it. The main point is the very last question.

I got into sex chatting as well and even though I like it, sometimes I feel like going: «I am wasting too much time on this, I'd be better off without it» Then I delete the program I use for it, I think I have moved on then sooner or later I feel like checking it again. It seems a bit addictive although it doesn't fill in all the addiction characteristics but still, it does seem that after a while it gets very difficult to stop doing them.

You are free to keep doing your RP thing, I don't see nothing wrong with it (unless you don't tell the other person) but let's say I use an argument so true and persuasive that you accept, the conclusion being «you should stop doing that». Now, imagining you truly believe you would be better off without it, do you think you could just give it up and never look back?

Again, the reasonable thing to do is to find a way to indulge in those things without hurting others or oneself. But still, it feels like a way one street.