[Contest Entry] THE ISHIHARA WHO STOLE CHRISTMAS
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THE GRINCHISHIHARA WHO STOLE CHRISTMAS.
It was a cold Christmas night all of the land skipped with glee except one Tokyo Governor WHO WAS SUPER PISSED, of course he was not pissed off for any old reason. One man stood in his way, I think you know who, yes the creator of FAKKU, MUTHERFUCKINGJACOB. Yes Jacob indeed, but this man has another secret alias, for he is..... THE PEDO BEAR. Ohohoho you seem quite lost let me tell you something, the pedo bear has been stealing all of the loli's. ISHIHARA LOVES HIS LOLI'S. I think you get the picture now. Ishihara plans to ruin Christmas for a certain someone, excuse me WILL ruin.
"Ishihara Sama." "Yes what is it my loli secretary?" "You have to see this!" "The pedo bear you say. Hmm this won't do, it looks like.... Im gonna has to kill me a pedo bear. I want to know who this man is RIGHT FUCKING NOW!" "YES SIR." ELSEWHERE. Jacob:" Man All of those loli's in my closet are dead. I have to go find some more. MOMOKA GET THE FUCK OUT HERE RIGHT FUCKING NOW SLAVE. Were on duty.
24 hours later. loli secretary: "WE HAVE A LEAD" Ishihara: "good job, Ill sex you real good later." loli secretary: "TEEHEE." Ishihara: " SO this sick fuck jacob is the man were looking for is it? What about this Momoka? loli secretary: We currently have no other information about her. Ishihara: Well good work...is what I'd like to say but this SHIT IS UNFUCKINGACCEPTABLE do you know what happend to my last secretary? I BURNED HER BODY AND SKULL FUCKED HER. loli secretary: "GASP." "If you don't want the same I suggest you work harder"."YES SIR." In the meantime Im going to pay Jacob a visit.....and destroy him.
"~In the night I creep alone down the chimney and in to jacobs home nananan~ lolool Ima rite this down." Noises"GIDFDNBKBNVJSDJB" "OUCH! WHATthe fyck does this man put in his fire place....OH SHI... you poor loli. ILL MAKE SURE THIS NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN, GONA BAG ME SOME LOLI'S. WHERE ARE YOU LOLI'S? Noises:"Door opening" Momoka:" BOY JACOB WE SURE CAUGHT ALOT THIS TIME." Jacob: "SHUT UP BITCH MAKE ME A SANDWICH." loli's: "LET US OUT PLEEEEEEEEEEEASE!" Jacob:"Gonna rape you good." lolis: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Ishihara: I have to save the loli's, nobody else can do it but me."
Jacob: "I'm gonna stash you guys in here for a bit. MOMOKA WHERE'S THAT FUCKING SANDWICH." Ishihara: "NOWS MY CHANCE. Loli's I've come to rescue you, get in the bag before they notice." loli's: "Wait why the fuck do we have to go back in a bag?" Ishihara: "THERES NO TIME TO TALK GET THE FUCK IN THE BAG." Noises: "running upstairs" Jacob: "who the fuck are you"? Ishihara: " You not need know my name, but I know yours PEDOBEAR." Jacob:"OH SHI.." Ishihara: " I have your loli's jacob, do you want them back? Of course you do. However I also need something." Jacob: "WHAT ANYTHING FOR MY LOLI'S." Ishihara: "Well...that's simple your life." jacob: "what I can't give you that I need it to rape loli's." Ishihara: "Of course you can...just die BLAM!"
Momoka: "WHAT DID YOU DO WHO WILL EAT THIS SANDWICH I POURED MY SOUL INTO NOW?" ishihara:" actually Im quite hungry, I just rid evil of the land, you see. Momokas eyes sparkled. Ishihara:" Would you like to come with me momoka your not a loli but you are quite the sandwich maker and I sure do need one of those." Momoka:" PLEASE TAKE ME WITH YOU." Ishihara: "Alright Momoka I can't imagine the hell your going to be in. I mean been through. Lets go. Got them loli's.................... "MISSION FUCKING ACCOMPLISHED!"
And they all lived happily ever after, or so they thought.
Jacob:" Ahh I'm alive, but how? Dammit Momoka isn't here, WHERE THE FUCK IS MY SANDWICH."
def not 1000 words.
PART TWO~ sometime in the future.
[/h]
It was a cold Christmas night all of the land skipped with glee except one Tokyo Governor WHO WAS SUPER PISSED, of course he was not pissed off for any old reason. One man stood in his way, I think you know who, yes the creator of FAKKU, MUTHERFUCKINGJACOB. Yes Jacob indeed, but this man has another secret alias, for he is..... THE PEDO BEAR. Ohohoho you seem quite lost let me tell you something, the pedo bear has been stealing all of the loli's. ISHIHARA LOVES HIS LOLI'S. I think you get the picture now. Ishihara plans to ruin Christmas for a certain someone, excuse me WILL ruin.
"Ishihara Sama." "Yes what is it my loli secretary?" "You have to see this!" "The pedo bear you say. Hmm this won't do, it looks like.... Im gonna has to kill me a pedo bear. I want to know who this man is RIGHT FUCKING NOW!" "YES SIR." ELSEWHERE. Jacob:" Man All of those loli's in my closet are dead. I have to go find some more. MOMOKA GET THE FUCK OUT HERE RIGHT FUCKING NOW SLAVE. Were on duty.
24 hours later. loli secretary: "WE HAVE A LEAD" Ishihara: "good job, Ill sex you real good later." loli secretary: "TEEHEE." Ishihara: " SO this sick fuck jacob is the man were looking for is it? What about this Momoka? loli secretary: We currently have no other information about her. Ishihara: Well good work...is what I'd like to say but this SHIT IS UNFUCKINGACCEPTABLE do you know what happend to my last secretary? I BURNED HER BODY AND SKULL FUCKED HER. loli secretary: "GASP." "If you don't want the same I suggest you work harder"."YES SIR." In the meantime Im going to pay Jacob a visit.....and destroy him.
"~In the night I creep alone down the chimney and in to jacobs home nananan~ lolool Ima rite this down." Noises"GIDFDNBKBNVJSDJB" "OUCH! WHATthe fyck does this man put in his fire place....OH SHI... you poor loli. ILL MAKE SURE THIS NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN, GONA BAG ME SOME LOLI'S. WHERE ARE YOU LOLI'S? Noises:"Door opening" Momoka:" BOY JACOB WE SURE CAUGHT ALOT THIS TIME." Jacob: "SHUT UP BITCH MAKE ME A SANDWICH." loli's: "LET US OUT PLEEEEEEEEEEEASE!" Jacob:"Gonna rape you good." lolis: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Ishihara: I have to save the loli's, nobody else can do it but me."
Jacob: "I'm gonna stash you guys in here for a bit. MOMOKA WHERE'S THAT FUCKING SANDWICH." Ishihara: "NOWS MY CHANCE. Loli's I've come to rescue you, get in the bag before they notice." loli's: "Wait why the fuck do we have to go back in a bag?" Ishihara: "THERES NO TIME TO TALK GET THE FUCK IN THE BAG." Noises: "running upstairs" Jacob: "who the fuck are you"? Ishihara: " You not need know my name, but I know yours PEDOBEAR." Jacob:"OH SHI.." Ishihara: " I have your loli's jacob, do you want them back? Of course you do. However I also need something." Jacob: "WHAT ANYTHING FOR MY LOLI'S." Ishihara: "Well...that's simple your life." jacob: "what I can't give you that I need it to rape loli's." Ishihara: "Of course you can...just die BLAM!"
Momoka: "WHAT DID YOU DO WHO WILL EAT THIS SANDWICH I POURED MY SOUL INTO NOW?" ishihara:" actually Im quite hungry, I just rid evil of the land, you see. Momokas eyes sparkled. Ishihara:" Would you like to come with me momoka your not a loli but you are quite the sandwich maker and I sure do need one of those." Momoka:" PLEASE TAKE ME WITH YOU." Ishihara: "Alright Momoka I can't imagine the hell your going to be in. I mean been through. Lets go. Got them loli's.................... "MISSION FUCKING ACCOMPLISHED!"
And they all lived happily ever after, or so they thought.
Jacob:" Ahh I'm alive, but how? Dammit Momoka isn't here, WHERE THE FUCK IS MY SANDWICH."
def not 1000 words.
PART TWO~ sometime in the future.
[/h]
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BUMPED AND REPPED BY THE WORD LOLI
< BROKEN SHIFT
BUMPED AND REPPED BY THE WORD LOLI
< BROKEN SHIFT
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Iam1vs100xp wrote...
neutralizing those negrepssomebody actually gave this negative rep?!? I laughed my ass off from start to finish. This is almost right on the kinda strange humor I tend to have.
*rises from his senatorial chair to give a standing ovation to Ishihara-sensei*
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this is the most amusing read so far after i read all of the entry, it might be not a winner but it win my joy to read.
i encourage this unique story to be continue.
i encourage this unique story to be continue.
