Dreams/ Memories ?
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PROLOGUE
"Ugh… Where am I? I have this feeling like I've been here somehow..."
As he took his first step, he felt a sudden, chilling breeze, blowing against his face. The wind grew stronger and within seconds, it started drizzling. As the raindrops fell and pattered on his head, he continued walking, ignoring the steady drum of the rain. Wrapped in the embrace of the rain and not a soul in sight, he continued to plod steadily onwards, ignoring the discomfort and unclear of his destination. However, confused as he was, he never had any hesitation when it came to choosing his path at junctions in the road. The road was so quiet that he could hear the patter of the raindrops grow more insistent, producing a rhythm that kept tempo with the increasingly piercing bite of the wind; an unrefined yet beautiful composition born of Mother Nature.
Wandering around aimlessly, without thought of where he was, he saw only one house that was illuminated and seemed to be occupied. As a strange feeling of familiarity and security descended upon him, he headed over toward the house without hesitation and pressed the doorbell. But the doorbell was as dead as the dreary world around him, so he knocked on the door and waited. Not a response could he detect. He knocked again and waited. After waiting for a long time, he gave up and decided to seek shelter at the entrance.
The rain soon stopped and the sun shined brightly again. However, the atmosphere still felt dead and lifeless as there wasn’t anything around. Not even a sign of life was around as the silence was still there. Hoping that someone was still in the house, he decides to try to open the door and see if it was unlocked.
"As I had expected, it was locked. Well... No choice eh? Looks like I just have to check out somewhere else."
Stepping out, he looked at his surrounding and saw a park nearby with a playground and decided to go over and take a sit to think over what he’s going to do next.
'Have I been here before? And where are the people?' he thought to himself. Looking towards the house again, it struck him. It was his old house where he used to stay when he was a kid. He saw a small boy running towards the house with another girl and went in. Thinking for a moment, he decided to go to the house and give it another try to get in.
“So there were people here after all? I suppose I could head back and ask for help.”
Just as he was about to leave, he heard the swings moving gently and turned round. To his surprise, he saw a small girl sitting all by herself staring at the cloudy sky.
"Was she even there when I came?" he asked himself in suspicion. She looked almost emotionless as he looked from a distance. Unable to ignore her, he approached her slowly. She was shivering and was wet with water still trickling down her long hair. It seems like she got caught in the rain but it was strange why she didn’t even bother to seek shelter. The girl gazed at him with a pair of cold eyes and it gave him a greater sense of curiosity.
"Hey there, why are you here all by yourself? Is anyone with you?"
She continued to gaze at him, keeping silent and looked down. He noticed that she had something in her hands as she clenches it tightly.
"What's that? May I take a look?" he smiled and asked her.
Once again, she looked up and stared at him for awhile and with a little hesitation, she opened her palm. It was a choker that looked somehow mystical. There was a pendant with piece of metal that shaped like a star stuck inside it.
"That's pretty! Did your mother give it to you? You better keep it in a safe place."
"Fuyumi..."
"Huh?"
"Fuyumi"
"Oh… Is that's your name? My name is Yuusuke! Nice to meet you!
"..."
"She sure is quiet..." he thought to himself and decides to walk off to the house he wanted to go to.
"... Alright, nice to meet you! I guess I’ll..."
"See you." she interrupted
"She seems to know what I was about to say. She sure is one weird girl" he thought to himself feeling surprised.
"Uh... Yeah. See you then." He took another glance at the pendant again but this time, he felt a strange sensation. It then started to emit a very strong bright light and it gradually blinded him. He couldn't see anything but he could hear a familiar voice.
"Yuusuke!!! Yuusuke!!! Don't tell me you're still..."
"Ouch!!!!!" he opened his eyes and he fell off the bed. Picking himself up, he realised that it was just a dream.
"Ugh… Where am I? I have this feeling like I've been here somehow..."
As he took his first step, he felt a sudden, chilling breeze, blowing against his face. The wind grew stronger and within seconds, it started drizzling. As the raindrops fell and pattered on his head, he continued walking, ignoring the steady drum of the rain. Wrapped in the embrace of the rain and not a soul in sight, he continued to plod steadily onwards, ignoring the discomfort and unclear of his destination. However, confused as he was, he never had any hesitation when it came to choosing his path at junctions in the road. The road was so quiet that he could hear the patter of the raindrops grow more insistent, producing a rhythm that kept tempo with the increasingly piercing bite of the wind; an unrefined yet beautiful composition born of Mother Nature.
Wandering around aimlessly, without thought of where he was, he saw only one house that was illuminated and seemed to be occupied. As a strange feeling of familiarity and security descended upon him, he headed over toward the house without hesitation and pressed the doorbell. But the doorbell was as dead as the dreary world around him, so he knocked on the door and waited. Not a response could he detect. He knocked again and waited. After waiting for a long time, he gave up and decided to seek shelter at the entrance.
The rain soon stopped and the sun shined brightly again. However, the atmosphere still felt dead and lifeless as there wasn’t anything around. Not even a sign of life was around as the silence was still there. Hoping that someone was still in the house, he decides to try to open the door and see if it was unlocked.
"As I had expected, it was locked. Well... No choice eh? Looks like I just have to check out somewhere else."
Stepping out, he looked at his surrounding and saw a park nearby with a playground and decided to go over and take a sit to think over what he’s going to do next.
'Have I been here before? And where are the people?' he thought to himself. Looking towards the house again, it struck him. It was his old house where he used to stay when he was a kid. He saw a small boy running towards the house with another girl and went in. Thinking for a moment, he decided to go to the house and give it another try to get in.
“So there were people here after all? I suppose I could head back and ask for help.”
Just as he was about to leave, he heard the swings moving gently and turned round. To his surprise, he saw a small girl sitting all by herself staring at the cloudy sky.
"Was she even there when I came?" he asked himself in suspicion. She looked almost emotionless as he looked from a distance. Unable to ignore her, he approached her slowly. She was shivering and was wet with water still trickling down her long hair. It seems like she got caught in the rain but it was strange why she didn’t even bother to seek shelter. The girl gazed at him with a pair of cold eyes and it gave him a greater sense of curiosity.
"Hey there, why are you here all by yourself? Is anyone with you?"
She continued to gaze at him, keeping silent and looked down. He noticed that she had something in her hands as she clenches it tightly.
"What's that? May I take a look?" he smiled and asked her.
Once again, she looked up and stared at him for awhile and with a little hesitation, she opened her palm. It was a choker that looked somehow mystical. There was a pendant with piece of metal that shaped like a star stuck inside it.
"That's pretty! Did your mother give it to you? You better keep it in a safe place."
"Fuyumi..."
"Huh?"
"Fuyumi"
"Oh… Is that's your name? My name is Yuusuke! Nice to meet you!
"..."
"She sure is quiet..." he thought to himself and decides to walk off to the house he wanted to go to.
"... Alright, nice to meet you! I guess I’ll..."
"See you." she interrupted
"She seems to know what I was about to say. She sure is one weird girl" he thought to himself feeling surprised.
"Uh... Yeah. See you then." He took another glance at the pendant again but this time, he felt a strange sensation. It then started to emit a very strong bright light and it gradually blinded him. He couldn't see anything but he could hear a familiar voice.
"Yuusuke!!! Yuusuke!!! Don't tell me you're still..."
"Ouch!!!!!" he opened his eyes and he fell off the bed. Picking himself up, he realised that it was just a dream.
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This seems like it could be the prelude to an intiguing story. Do you plan on writing more chapters?
The only things I can point out are a strange tense shift mid-sentence and a missing letter here and there.
The only things I can point out are a strange tense shift mid-sentence and a missing letter here and there.
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Good title, it seems to fit. This does seem like a prelude. All I can see is there are some strange tense shifts throughout, as well as some extra ","s in there, but good work, keep it up. :D
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Oh thanks! It's some old stuff that I did like years ago but never managed to finish it cos I totally have no idea how i wanted it to proceed and end. xD
I do have some writeups of the later chapters but its seems like plain old boring text to me
I do have some writeups of the later chapters but its seems like plain old boring text to me
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Thought I would upload the images of the character. Not done by me though, its by a friend who belong to the same doujinshi group as me.
I guess from the "prologue" you can already see 2 characters and of course an unknown one towards the end.
I guess from the "prologue" you can already see 2 characters and of course an unknown one towards the end.
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I liked the story and the artwork(lucky bastard! :D ). But I kinda feel like you ended the story quite....unnaturally...
*sigh* I wish Damien was here.
PS
I found it rather funny that Yuusuke said "Ouch!" before he even fell off the bed :lol:
*sigh* I wish Damien was here.
PS
bj0rN wrote...
"Ouch!!!!!" he opened his eyes and he fell off the bed. Picking himself up, he realised that it was just a dream.I found it rather funny that Yuusuke said "Ouch!" before he even fell off the bed :lol:
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Uzumaki101 wrote...
I liked the story and the artwork(lucky bastard! :D ). But I kinda feel like you ended the story quite....unnaturally...*sigh* I wish Damien was here.
PS
bj0rN wrote...
"Ouch!!!!!" he opened his eyes and he fell off the bed. Picking himself up, he realised that it was just a dream.I found it rather funny that Yuusuke said "Ouch!" before he even fell off the bed :lol:
Of course~ The pain wasn't felt because he fell off the bed. It's because of "something else"!
=)
0
bj0rN wrote...
Uzumaki101 wrote...
I liked the story and the artwork(lucky bastard! :D ). But I kinda feel like you ended the story quite....unnaturally...*sigh* I wish Damien was here.
PS
bj0rN wrote...
"Ouch!!!!!" he opened his eyes and he fell off the bed. Picking himself up, he realised that it was just a dream.I found it rather funny that Yuusuke said "Ouch!" before he even fell off the bed :lol:
Of course~ The pain wasn't felt because he fell off the bed. It's because of "something else"!
=)
hm? I don't understand...
0
Uzumaki101 wrote...
bj0rN wrote...
Uzumaki101 wrote...
I liked the story and the artwork(lucky bastard! :D ). But I kinda feel like you ended the story quite....unnaturally...*sigh* I wish Damien was here.
PS
bj0rN wrote...
"Ouch!!!!!" he opened his eyes and he fell off the bed. Picking himself up, he realised that it was just a dream.I found it rather funny that Yuusuke said "Ouch!" before he even fell off the bed :lol:
Of course~ The pain wasn't felt because he fell off the bed. It's because of "something else"!
=)
hm? I don't understand...
You'll soon find out why. =D
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Well~ I'm suppose to introduce a new character in the next chapter. But guess I could show you guys how she looks with a character design that my friend did for me. Cheers.
Hope you all like it. =D
Hope you all like it. =D
