I'm not gonna be writing a whole life story (atleast not yet) but I figure a quick summery would be ok going year by year listing only a few incidents that have somewhat influenced me
ages 1 through 5 I don't remember was 5 and a half when I had my first memory
age 5 only things I can remember is my father hitting me,
that one time I ran through a dark backyard from two Rottweilers,
and my first experience with rage and adrenaline(I'm assuming) I was playing with a dart hit a cactus I went to pick it out and it pricked me I felt the pain looked at the blood and I didn't think I just wanted to get back at something I stabbed the cactus several times it was constantly pricking me but I didn't feel hurt I was only aware of being pricked but felt no pain I practically tore it apart then while walking away I yanked all the cactus pricks out of my arm again feeling nothing
last thing I remember before leaving my fathers house is just barely waking up hearing a loud bang seeing the door open blinded by the light and hearing my mothers voice then being carried still unable to see shortly after either passing out or my memory must gone blank from then
age 6 my grandmother told me of how my father tried to kill my mother I trained to kill my father since then I trained at school in my dojo even at home
I studied the human body to find weakness flaws I could take advantage of and simultaneously cover my own flaws or attempt to get rid of any weakness entirely
my first school was hands on if anything happened you could expect a teacher to (try to) flail you to the ground I fought back no matter what
age 7found a kitchen knife that I was very interested in I took it and hid it from my mother worked out it for a while and trained with it.
got into military stuff did a lot of research into warfare tactics watched movies a lot of military channel got really into ww2 stuff read several history books eventually got into sun Tzu's art of war then I was motivated to get into psychological warfare.
tried to be nice to this one kid during gardening class cus he was new to the school he poured water on me and I hated him cus of it I honestly wished he would die I regretted that later he got shot while playing basketball with 2 older adults (drive by 2 shots to the chest one to the neck he wasn't the target just wrong place wrong time I'm guessing they wanted to kill one of the two adults he was playing basketball with)
age 8 thinking on that age I remember a lot of fights I was getting stronger and stronger and a lot more aggressive I made my own knife out of wood it had a good handle for grip I focused a lot of time on the stabbing edge and the secondary stabbing point at the bottem of the handle its cutting edge and reverse edge weren't very good I kept it hidden at school.
age 9 got into a school gang ended up being in a lot more fights I flipped a table on one dude ended up hurling a rock at another I ended up being slammed into a wall by a teacher who tried to restrain me but couldn't get a good latch onto me I punched em and elbowed him in the stomach spat in his face I ended up with a bloody nose from being slammed like that but I still did enough damage to call us even.
age 10 I remember this girl she tried to kill herself in the boys bathroom hung herself she ended up surviving but was stuck with a neckcast walked funny and couldn't go to the bathroom by herself had to have a staff with her at all times I also remember this other girl she was in a sense my stalker she followed me no matter how hard I tried to run from her she didn't understand a word I said tho she couldn't speak English very well.
age 11more fights more people getting knocked the fuck out whats new? oh yea the fact that it took over 5 staff (fully grown adults and they still couldn't hold there own against me a child at the time) to hold me down I gotten too strong for them but this time they decided to play dirty they fucking dogpiled on me slammed me face first into the ground my nose was bleeding and I was being crushed it became hard to breath and I was spitting blood I fought back hard as I could but they wouldn't get off of me till I was just moments away from fainting from lack of oxygen
first thing I did was go to the bathroom to try and clean myself I saw my face covered in blood black eye, nose still bleeding several bruses on my neck and shoulders blood all over my torn and fucked up shirt I got angry didn't even try to clean myself just walked out faced the teachers and screamed at them(look at this you fucking happy?! look at what you did! this what the fuck you wanted? huh?! fuck you!) spitting blood on the walls spitting blood at them they looked at me like they'd seen a fucking ghost.
my mother took me out of that school immediately after that and there was more then enough legal repercussions to pretty much cripple that school.
age 12 ah "rise" you could almost smell the bloodlust in the air
worst I had to deal with in my old school they were fighters,
they might beat the crap outta ya but you'd live,
these guys though I remember they put everyone through a medal detector test searched everyone I asked a classmate and he told me they started doing that because someone had an uzi in their locker people really wanted to kill here everything was a test everything was a fight you wanted something from someone you had to prove your worth or stay outta everyone's way. oh and on top of being at rise my mother tried to suffocate me
age 13 few fights and death threats later I got close with some of the leaders of the gangs people on both sides wanted me to train them in hand to hand combat I helped where I could stayed out of fights as best I could but jumped in when I felt necessary,
I fired my first gun at this age too.
age 14 alright I'm filled with nothing but regrets from this age so lets keep this short and sweet a lot of shit happened and a lot of people got killed a lot of my friends ended up dying and I came pretty fking close to getting killed too.
age 15 moved on from "rise" to a place called sandpaths,
I actually did die at this age well kinda but not really I was in a car crash got hit in the chest ended up stopping my heart luckily we were close to a hospital and they brought me back with that defibrillator I think its called
legally I was considered dead for a little while but once again not really,
a close friend of mine was there with me.
age 16someone actually called a hit on me it was cus of some bitch at school she got abandoned shortly after,
moved schools again ended up in a non violent school finally, or so I thought
regardless due to my prior experiences and the sheer weakness and idiocy of the people there all the people even the strong ones there were extremely weak to me.
age 17 I honestly didn't think my father could get any lower then the scum he already was in my eyes, I was wrong, my grandmother told me of how my father tried to kill me even before I was born my mother was 6 months pregnant when he pointed a gun at her he attacked her at her work while she was pregnant luckly for my mother and for me her co workers protected her (and me if you really think about it) what kinda low scum could do something like that? well my fucking homicidal father obviously.
I still had gang contacts(and still do) and I knew which prison my father is in all it would've took was one phone call and my father would have been a dead man,
but no I want to kill him myself (and still do).
age 18
my last surviving friend in the gang died about halfway into the year (the same friend who was there for me when I had "died" earlier) I heard about it from getting a phone call by an associate they wanted revenge and I assisted them with it my biggest regret of all that is even though he was there for me when I "died" I wasn't there for him when he finally kicked it felt maybe if I was there I coulda done something to save em.
currently age 19 former unofficial gang affiliate currently unemployed planning on heading to collage and I'm going into "on call" security work also planning on joining the US army reserves while I'm in college
once I graduate college I plan on joining the police force
all in all I was raised a soldier(just a fucking killer really) and I plan on using the skills I was gifted with
(my natural physical strength and my knowledge of guerrilla warfare, blitzkrieg, psychological warfare trained in the use of handguns, assault rifles, sub-machineguns heavy machineguns, sniper rifles, hardcore training with blades of all types I have an obsession with blades for some reason its a personal hobby,
severe physical training in unarmed combat to both be able to kill unarmed and fight multiple opponents also did damage training to not only numb out pain but start to enjoy it)
lets face it I figure I'm of no use for anything other then fighting and killing but I want to atleast try to live a peaceful life, guess just gonna try to readjust to a nonviolent (or atleast less violent then what I'm used to) society
