I have a lot of mixed feelings about this. First off, spoiler warning for people who haven't read yet but have decided to glance through the replies for some reason.
The ending was dark, but it felt like it needed to be. The story as a whole is bloody and gritty, very different from Children of Lux, and I applaud you for doing something that I myself don't have the balls to do. (Yes, I recall that you're not a guy.) Having said that though, there are some things that bothered me.
Are all Mark 2's as powerful as Rebecca? I don't have a straight answer after reading through to the end, but I would think not. Otherwise, I don't understand why they wouldn't rule the world at this point.
Perfect for getting the masses to do whatever he wanted.
I don't disagree with this sentence, but it's so heavy-handed. Surely there's a more subtle way to put it.
She took a quick glance along the other buildings and both sides of the road, everything looked clear until the sounds of cars engines started powering to life. Both ends of the sandy roads were cut off by military Humvees with large guns placed on their roofs with gunners operating them. There was roughly 6 in total; 3 on either side. A speaker was activated on the side the woman was facing “Rebecca Slate, we have you surrounded! Drop to your knees and place your hands on top of your head!” the soldier operating the speaker demanded.
Two things that bother me here. One, how the hell did they track her there? Two, do they not know about her powers? She blew up an aircraft carrier after killing everyone on board. Six humvees is not enough to take her down.
“What the Hell are you?”
How does he not know by now? Would his superiors really send him after Rebecca without telling him anything?
“How the hell did you get in here?” Gilson wheezed as she applied a tad bit more pressure onto his sternum.
Again, how much do they know about Rebecca? Given that Gilson did an extensive background check on her, he should at least have an idea of what Rebecca's powers are in which case he would not be asking such a question. He would know damn well that she teleported/flew in after annihilating all the guards.
Usually we wouldn’t deal with terrorists but it was one Mark 2 and they were offering a large body of money that we were using to hunt you with.
Here's another detail that doesn't make sense to me if Gilson knew about Rebecca's powers beforehand. If I were Gilson's boss, I'd give him all the money I could spare.
“You…you sold my little sister? And for what? Money? You really are a sick, sick bastard…”
But isn't Annie at least with her own kind now? Sure they're terrorists, but they're basically on the same side as Rebecca. Isn't that better than being a prisoner in Gilson's hands?
“That’s a handwritten suicide not. I forged your handwriting so no-one will know the difference. How about this for a headline: †˜Chairman of the Oxrell project commits suicide because of the guilt of murdering so many Mark 2’s as was claimed in his suicide note’?” Rebecca asked sarcastically.
I hope Rebecca isn't hoping for that note to work. Sure the damage his body takes from the fall will probably hide traces of the beating he took, but it's going to be tough to believe he committed suicide at the same time a Mark 2 just happened to go on a rampage in the area.
“Why your little sister of course!” he chuckled at her feigned ignorance. He handed her some kind of location device with an X and Y coordinates on it as well as a grid like structure on its screen.
This is probably the most convenient thing ever. Never mind how suspicious Rebecca is or the fact that this mystery man probably has alternative motives. It's just too out of nowhere for me to accept. I'd would rather have had a time jump of a week or two during which Rebecca did her own reconnaissance.
“Very well done Annie, good girl” he patted her on the head and looked back to Rebecca with the same smile as before.
What has Annie even done besides be a hostage? She could have been dead this whole time, and Rebecca still would have went to their base if she thought she was there. And why doesn't Annie react at all to Rebecca being shot?
“So thank you for being an appropriate puppet. Without knowing it, you were obeying our orders and will help us fulfil our goal: Of destroying all humans and replacing them with Mark 2’s!” he said with a maniacal ring to his voice.
“I don’t understand! I thought you wanted equality!” Rebecca said in a daze of confusion.
So . . . why the hell did he shoot Rebecca? Also is getting shot twice enough to put all the fight out of her? She can't even attempt to strike back?
“You played your role perfectly, but you aren’t among the main cast of this little play I’m afraid. You’ve killed too many of our undercover informants, by mistake of course, but it means you have outlived your usefulness and…”
I fail to see how. Given how much of a badass Rebecca is, shouldn't they want her to join their side?