That is a Bloody Long Title, Isn't It?!

Here is an account of what happened before the story proper and what most likely happened before so many a story set in Planet Earth.

1. A clump of dirt, floating through space, slowly snowballed into a quite a large piece of rock by attracting other clumps of dirt, rock and boulders. Gravity and electrostatic forces were involved.

2. The large piece of rock was eventually so large that it assumed a spherical shape, able to retain a (relatively) thin layer of gas and liquids, a molten rock core that allows for the creation of a magnetic field.

3. After having gone through a bombardment of comets carrying the ingredients needed to make and sustain life, the large piece of rock around 12000 kilometres in diameter, made and sustained life. More comets and lighting bolts were involved in the process.

4. After life graced this very rock, hundreds of millions of years passed. The minute lifeforms, guided by the forces of natural selection, thrived, multiplied and eventually raised oxygen levels in the atmosphere to the extent that larger lifeforms now begun appearing in the tiny film of water covering that rock.

5. Among these lifeforms was a strange breed of anthropoid ape. They are hairless, gormless, easily wiped out by natural disasters, predators and physical force and almost went extinct, if not for their out-of-proportion brains!

6. And it was the descendants of these apes, who sailed out of the plains of some faraway place to settle at another faraway continent with impassable mountains to the north, fertile lands in the south, a mucky swamp sandwiched between both the north and south with an endless body of water around its flanks.

7. And number 7 is finally the number where we actually get to the bloody story!

It is more of an introduction which is really needed when you realise that one of the main actors of this story is a green, ten-headed anthropoid lifeform.

8. When hairless anthropoid apes, also known as humans, begun appearing on the face of this earth, they started off as hunter gatherers and scavengers, wandering from nowhere to nowhere, got themselves nearly wiped out as a result and then came up with civilisation as a means to combat the extinction-inducing mortality rates.

It so happens that the peoples of this story settled in a continent of much geographical diversity and begun building their hovels and shack towns to engage in cellular mitosis with occasional cellular meiosis when sex occurs, also known as establishing civilisations to live in, multiply and (not) prosper.

What follows after the above two paragraphs of gibberish are descriptions of the peoples who exist in this story and the geography of the lands they lived in:

The Monkeys:

While one would perceive the label "Monkey" as being offensive and many more would perceive that label being suggestive of animals that are actually monkeys, "The Monkeys" being human are very, very distantly related to monkeys. However, those who first came up with the name meant all the offence that could be packed into that word.

They are named thus because they are very hairy, with near bushels of hair growing at very inch of their bodies save their face, their palms and the soles of their feet.

The fact that they conduct semi-annual rituals that are performed by shamans dressed like monkeys and that they domesticate monkeys to serve their mainly agricultural needs does little to dissociate The Monkeys from actual monkeys.

To further reinforce the stereotype, they are by nature a boisterous, intelligent and physically resilient lot. Yet they are easily carried away, rash, resent authority and above all, annoying. Those who have been in contact with them would admire them for their wit and agility only to despise them very shortly after for being very annoying.

It might not surprise one to learn that their communities are very small due to their inability to organise themselves.

The Land of the Not-Monkeys that

Streaks of lightning clove the sky, followed by blasts of thunder and rocks torn asunder from the sheer force that is produced by charged ions created by the friction between particles in the sky, like water and dust for instance. This very force originating from the heavens breathe life into inanimate particles by changing them from simple to complex.

The transition from non-life to life occurs when the particles begin to interact with the environment they are in and form reproductive cycles. These particles then become proto-lifeforms. They would take in other molecules and pass these molecules out, replicate themselves and die off. This is a process that is much more miraculous than the transition from life to non-life, unless one would think that dying after living for 80 years or getting stabbed to death is anything but not mundane.

Some of these proto-lifeforms grew much, much bigger because of conditions conducive to its growth like the exponential increase of relatively unstable oxygen in the atmosphere in terms of geographical time. In the course of hundreds of millions of years, one would cease to name them as proto-lifeforms but call them microorganisms that could, in the most ideal scenario, form a symbiotic relationship with your body or potentially eat your insides and kill you slowly.

These microorganisms would continue to replicate and get themselves killed. Some would grow ever the more larger and complex while some would remain the same, while some would become simpler. It is all dependent on the environment they reside in, for indeed, it is the whims of the environment that shapes and moulds them.

For those microorganisms that became larger and bigger, one shall now name that 'organisms' instead of 'macroorganisms'. Despite their relative largeness, they are still bound to these fluxes where the invisible hand of the environment crafts them, shapes them, breathes diversity into them.

And then, through the passage of time, over the course of millions of years (as opposed to hundreds of millions of years), intelligent anthropoid apes, begun appearing on the surface, products of that invisible hand.

Those anthropoid apes that are hairy are derogatorily called 'monkeys' and they settled in somewhere between the North and the South. Those that are not hairy settled in the North and the South were responsible for calling their hairier cousins 'monkeys' and called themselves 'not-monkeys'.

To facilitate communication, those from the North and the South they eventually came up with a name to name their land. Those that lived in the land of the not-Monkeys that is to the North called their land "Land of the Not-Monkeys that is to the North" or Lannomonthaistonor for short.

Those that lived in the land of the not-monkeys that is to the South called their land "Land of the Not-Monkeys that is to the South" or Lannomonthaistosou for short.

Those hairy inhabitants that lived in the land of the monkeys, have their land called "The Land of the Monkeys", nothing short of that.

It must be added that their idea of 'short' is anything but! It also must be added that the layman would call these anthropoid apes, hairy or not, humans.

Without a system of rigorous empirical and deductive methods to trace events of the past or predict the future, also known as modern science, those living in Lannomothaistonor, Lannomothaistosou and the Land of Monkeys can't appreciate the events that took hundreds of millions of years to occur. Thus they are so easily duped and manipulated by yet another race of hairless anthropoid apes that lived in the mountainous Far North who incidentally have the access to modern science.

These mountain people are called 'Gods' by those who do not live in those mountains. They are a race that is technologically advanced but their numbers are small due to epidemics, war and other crises that so plagued civilisation. They demand offerings from time to time and manage to do so through coercion. That could mean firing a gun or dressing up like an idiot and perform magic tricks or some other display of technology that primitives call magic.

The four peoples lived together in relative harmony, if being isolated for long periods of time from each other, resorting to occasion violence and displays of technological superiority, can be considered as that. That is until, the Gods became aware that the people of Lannomothaistosou are behaving in a way that is not to their liking.

HOW'S THAT FOR A PROLOGUE EH? NOW YOU UNDERSTAND HOW IT FEELS LIKE TO READ LINES UPON LINES OF NONSENSE THAT MAKE NO SENSE ONLY TO GET TO THE BLOODY POINT AT THE BLOODY END!

AND AS A REWARD, FEAST YOUR EYES TO THIS! I WAGER THIS IS SOMETHING YOU LIKE! https://www.fakku.net/viewtopic.php?t=98170 (Livided, I am so sorry.)

IS A LONG AND WINDING PROLOGUE THAT DETAILS ABIOGENESIS, THE RISE OF MULTI-CELLULAR LIFE AND THE ASCENT OF MAN, TOO MUCH IS ASK FOR AS BACKGROUND MATERIAL?! HUH! HUUUUUH!