Ever get tired of Naruto and Bleach tards?

To all anime veterans: This is the declaration, if not war then open hostilities against all anime neophytes who've just discovered this medium and just gotta tell you why it's awesome.

Instead writing a manifesto, I'll just write who I am, where I come from and why these young ones annoy the fuck out of me. When I can, I ignore them, but that's hard to do when they scream in your face.

I've been watching anime for more than 15 years. That might have nothing on the heroic age western veterans of anime who started before I was even born, but at least I can say I've been at this for a while. Frankly I can sympathize more with their generation than those lucky enough to have Cartoon Network's adult swim and ANN pamper them from the get go.

Why? Because I live in East Europe. Beside a couple of titles (Sailor Moon, DBZ - the later was even banned!) no anime was broadcast here for a good 10 years. We didn't have fan-subbed VHS cassettes either. All we had was the Internet and shitty real media to early windows media (DivX done wrong) transcripts of said VHS tapes painstakingly leeched bit-by-bit through the then forming Internet. Often through dial-up... or you paid big bucks to a rich guy with broadband, so they'd burn them onto CD-R. Yes CDs. I still have a Neon Genesis Evangelion RIP around that was mpg. transcripts of VHS rips, so it took up 13 CDs.

So back then, anime was something rare, exotic and hard to get hold of. You had to go out of your way to get it, you were scouring the neonatal file-sharing networks that would give users used to the convenience of torrent nightmares, you arranged meeting and swapped CDs for big bucks like some shady music pirate.

Over the years I've watched hundreds of titles. Eventually the novelty wore off, but I was hooked by then. Every once in a while I found a title that was just awesome:
-Explosive Action!
-Really slap-stick and free flowing comedy!
-A nice story with some dramatic overtones that made you *think*
-A very good setting with some quaint questions about the state of life (back before the moe storm, anime used to pump out exotic settings by the dozen).
-Memorable characters who *felt* real, more than a mere collection of stereotypes

Is that type of anime gone? Hell no. It's just rare. It was rare back then too, but we old fans tend to reminiscence over the exceptionally good titles. 90% of everything is crap. That didn't change.

...but then YOU show up. YOU just SAW THE BEST THING EVER! It's SO COOL, because it has NINJAS in it! ...and all the super-kinetic ACTION!

Yeah, yeah I try to move out of the way, go about my business...

...but YOU KEEP SCREAMING, that I SHOULD WATCH IT! THAT IT's THE BEST THING EVER!

Now I'm pissed.

Entertaining? Maybe. For a newborn each and every joke is new. Good? Could be... chances are it won't. This isn't the OVA boom anymore. Anime like everything is else is done by committees, rarely daring to be experimental or even try new things. Best? Get real.

You want to know what's best is?

-BEST is when Spike blows you away as Blues is running in your veins and the whole world hurts.
-BEST is when Noriko blasts Jupiter away, and you can feel everything being ripped away from the heroines through the caprices of space-time dilation.
-BEST is when the heroine whispers to the hero "What big teeth you have!"... and Fuse "eats" her and discards the last of his humanity.
-BEST is when Goto screams "It's already too late now!" and the tension building all this time finally lets loose and all that can stop the coming chaos is the ragtag SV2 and one Shinobu Nagumo... who still has feelings for the man behind all of this.

So, young ones. What's to be done?
Watch some anime. Older titles. Newere titles. Broaden your horizons a bit. Experiment, try new things, let the new experiences build you. Eventually wisdom and a feel for what things are great will come to you on its own.

...just leave me the hell alone, until you can form coherent sentences and compare you favorite show to more than 2 titles.