Funny Stories of your Grandparents

I got curious after i remembered funny(or at least interesting) stories told to me by my Grandfather that happened during WW2.
Okay, listen:
While securing some village deep in the forest (my grandfather were in recon force during WW2) his squad faced no resistance. To be accurate, there wasn't any German soldier or civilian in that village. During search of the village he checked one of the houses and found no one inside. Then he shouted to his teammates "Kim da sokh!"(Which means "There's no one inside!" in Yakut language) And than some secret trap-door opened and Germans came out with hands in the air. It seems that they heard that shout but thought that it was "Hendehoch!" as if "Hands up! Surrender!"

And there's another one:
During winter of 1943 there was patrol on skies(or ski-patrol? i dunno, correct me if I'm wrong) with thick fog. Suddenly in front of squad appeared German patrol(also on skies) so they hit the deck and started shouting "Surrender!" etc.
After some moments they realized that screams in german are also coming from very close. They checked and found German soldier in their ranks. When he realized that he got into a wrong place he... farted. :) Everybody laughed their asses off and parted without fighting.

C'mon, share your stories!

P.S. Sorry for my awful English.

Sorry, don't have any but that last one just shows to people remain human most of the time, and even if they're enemies they can still respect a good laugh.

I don't have any stories because I don't live near them.
3/4 have passed away, so I don't think I'll be having an funny stories of my grandparents in the future. :(

Well my Grandmother on my Mothers side (English) told me about the American camp that was near the town and how there was so much fucking going on that there were "Condoms hanging from the treebranches". (Fun times)

My Grandmother on my Fathers side (German) told me about the time when she first saw an American Negro soldier and how she was afraid of being "Raped then eaten" so she hooked up with a British squaddie ASA fucking P.

My grandfather on my mothers side (Welsh) was long gone by the time I was born but I was told that he was hard as nails and he had "hands like shovels", Had a leg blown off by a cannon shell too ive been told. (He was a truck driver)

My grandfather on my fathers side (Welsh) didnt tell me shit about the war and hardly spoke to me at all. I think he had a lot of demons.

My Grandfather on my mothers' side always talks about the war. He had one story about where once every two weeks he had to go up north from the base he was stationed at and do laundry in a Liberated Death camp. They had cleaned out the gas chambers and turned them into laundry rooms. That story kinda gave me the creeps but it was interesting to listen to.

My grandparents are all too young.

I do know my father's side was very active (SS, with a son in the youth). Figures the generation immediately following marries a Black/Jewish(ethnic)/Gypsy(also ethnic)/Puerto Rican/Irish girl.

*I do not condone killing, racism, fanaticism, lunacy, facism, supremacy (including Superman), etc.