I wanna share to you guys my first manga
0
first post yay~!
so i was heartbroken this december--
how do i combat my unfortunate fate of love?
become a hikikomori and make a manga!! XD
Shichi
there are many mistakes that i made in making this manga and hopefully i can assimilate what i've learned and move on with a better manga to present you in the future... if i have any future in doujin making...
PS-- new to the forums scene-- how do you do those img preview things?
so i was heartbroken this december--
how do i combat my unfortunate fate of love?
become a hikikomori and make a manga!! XD
Shichi
there are many mistakes that i made in making this manga and hopefully i can assimilate what i've learned and move on with a better manga to present you in the future... if i have any future in doujin making...
PS-- new to the forums scene-- how do you do those img preview things?
0
EddieBeInBeddie
Tea, Coffee, Glances
Backgrounds. Especially in your establishing shots. I don't feel the walls to the room.
Your storytelling/ panel flow is basic, but good. I want more of the book-- not just the tentacles, but other quasi magical stuff.
Cute girl.
What bugs you the most about it? I'm a writer, but I find that if I admit what's bugging me about a piece, I get advice to fix it-- or told I'm worrying over x when y is the real problem.
Your storytelling/ panel flow is basic, but good. I want more of the book-- not just the tentacles, but other quasi magical stuff.
Cute girl.
What bugs you the most about it? I'm a writer, but I find that if I admit what's bugging me about a piece, I get advice to fix it-- or told I'm worrying over x when y is the real problem.
0
yeah-- you could just tell where I prefer to draw in those pages, eh? (ergo the action, and not the establishing shots XD)
aside from the much disinterest on the BG, I could definitely improve on toning the whole page. I made a mistake on putting way too many tones in one layer that it takes effort to fix/improve the toning.
I realized this after a couple of pages in but I kinda wanted for this to finish so I can move on to a new project and left it as is.
I'm thinking of continuing a set of stories where the book is the constant element (was thinking of having an interesting design to the book to make it stand out) and this was a test if it works
aside from the much disinterest on the BG, I could definitely improve on toning the whole page. I made a mistake on putting way too many tones in one layer that it takes effort to fix/improve the toning.
I realized this after a couple of pages in but I kinda wanted for this to finish so I can move on to a new project and left it as is.
I'm thinking of continuing a set of stories where the book is the constant element (was thinking of having an interesting design to the book to make it stand out) and this was a test if it works
0
Eddie basically said this already but I would like to put it into my own words.
First, great perspective when you use it. I am humbled.
But! I like world building. If I want a bunch of sex, tentacle or otherwise, there are so many other options out there. what makes your world unique, what makes me want to like this girl? she's cute, but who is she? Bored girl? no, there's more to her.
Still I found it entertaining and the concept makes me want to read a more fleshed out comic.
First, great perspective when you use it. I am humbled.
But! I like world building. If I want a bunch of sex, tentacle or otherwise, there are so many other options out there. what makes your world unique, what makes me want to like this girl? she's cute, but who is she? Bored girl? no, there's more to her.
Still I found it entertaining and the concept makes me want to read a more fleshed out comic.
1
someonehotter wrote...
Eddie basically said this already but I would like to put it into my own words.First, great perspective when you use it. I am humbled.
But! I like world building. If I want a bunch of sex, tentacle or otherwise, there are so many other options out there. what makes your world unique, what makes me want to like this girl? she's cute, but who is she? Bored girl? no, there's more to her.
Still I found it entertaining and the concept makes me want to read a more fleshed out comic.
Duly noted. I'll keep that in mind if I think of continuing her story XD
Thanks for the critiq~~