The Jesus wrote...
When I feel down, I let 54 parakeets, or some other kind of small exotic bird, but always in groups of 54, loose in my house and fire a nail gun at them, trying to stick them on the walls. Even if I can't, the chaos still lifts my spirits. There's something about the colors and the impending doom of creatures smaller than me that makes me feel almost godlike.
Sometimes I wonder if, for God, everyday is like firing a nail gun at small, colorful birds scared shitless by the knowledge of certain death... but I digress.
I've found a new hobby.