Why do I feel threatened by my partner's opposite-sex friend

I saw this on yahoo personals... XD, just wanna share this one to you...
for those with these feelings...

this might give you idea on what to do in this kinds of cases maybe



Question: Why do I feel threatened by my partner's opposite-sex friends?

Answer : Answer

maybe the partner's friends are hotter than the question asker.

wow, nice find!

Another way you can look at the topic statement is " Are you jealous of you girlfriend's male friends?"

I've haven't been in that situation before, but I do know about it from conversations from with my buddies. If you are jealous then hang out with her male friend, since he is your girlfriend's friend you might have somethings in common. Getting jealous about these things shows your immaturity and your insecurity over something small.

this article never made references to specific genders of the subject, so it can also easily be taken as "are you jealous of your boyfriend's girl friends?"

i think the article is interesting and does make a point that there should be some concern. but i think that concern should only be applied when they are hanging out 1 on 1 with that person outside of work, when they should be at home with their partner. and i'm not condoning "opposite sex friends" because obviously that would be the same for me, but theres a point i'd stop at and be like "i'm in a relationship, sorry". and besides if your partner makes you uncomfortable with this you can break up, thats an easy solution to the problem as well

Aye. And yes, I am. But I guess it's normal.

I used to be waaaay more jealous before, but as time went by, I started getting more at ease/ less concerned with her male friends. I'm still pretty jealous. I'm sure it'll go away with time.

Really? Hmm. Have you had any bad experiences in the past that made you wary?

Personally, despite my distrustful character, I've never been much one for jealousy. That's (or at least used to be) her role in our relationship - she had two of her previous relationships end because she was cheated on. So, for a while, she used to be extremely jealous of my female friends. And my male friends. And a great number of other females I would randomly encounter.
Then she noticed the way I look at other women (or simply people in general).
Problem solved.

Well back when I still was together with my girlfriend I was kinda jealous of them, and a little wary. But the fact that I got along with them made it a lot more easy.

Jealously could be good and bad.

Showing a bit of jealously could be good for a relationship. It shows that you care, usually those who show a bit of jealously will have partners that are less likely to stray. Being with someone that's never jealous could lead to random flirting, and such. Since your partner has the 'Whatever' attitude it leads to partners thinking it's okay since your partner doesn't 'mind'.

It could be bad in the sense of, the topic question. Feeling threatened by your partner's opposite-sex friend. Jealously is founded on insecurities about yourself and about not pleasing your partner. So if you feel that you haven't been making your partner happy, but someone else is - that person will instantly become a threat to you.

If someone feels this way, they should just spend more time with his/her significant other. They should also find out what's troubling their partner and make him/her happier. Talking it out will help a lot.

Yeah and no. Within reasonable limits I'd say this is a good idea.
Sadly, people rarely display that sort of moderation, and tend to take things to extremes, especially when it comes to jealousy.
The result: Extreme clingyness which does the relationship more bad than good.


I'm not sure how far I trust conventional wisdom when it comes to that.
Admittedly, personal observation isn't worth much, but from what I've experienced, relaxed couples tend to actually have less problems with fidelity.
Simply because if the ground rules aren't constantly being brought up, there's less friction and less enticement to defy them.