An agnostic/atheist surrounded by theists.
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Iamnotchrishansen
Jiggy Blackson
I am one of those people and my friends and family are all theists. I try to keep it to myself and go as far as to "pray" during family meetings. I fear that if I break it to anyone they are going to hate me. What's worse is that my Grandmother is a Clergywoman at a church. Another sad thing is my little brother and I are really close and he HATES atheists. How should I break it to them? Or should I remain silent about my non-belief? Can anyone relate to this?
UPDATE --If anyone really cares I just broke the news to my brother and everything went fine. Thanks for the advice and support FAKKU denizens. Now all that remains is the rest of my family (especially on my father's side)
UPDATE --If anyone really cares I just broke the news to my brother and everything went fine. Thanks for the advice and support FAKKU denizens. Now all that remains is the rest of my family (especially on my father's side)
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Yeah, that sounds very familiar. I was raised in a strict Catholic household in a predominantly Christian nation, but ever since I was a child I never really believed in any of that blather. Finally discovered what "atheist" meant in middle school--right after my Confirmation sacrament, ironically--and then I knew what I was and why I just couldn't believe in what the rest of my family and friends believed in. Teh bf's family is extremely religious too, of the 7th day Adventist sort.
I'm extremely uncomfortable with prayer, sacraments, etc, and I think it's an incredible waste of time. However, if I'm in a religious person's house, I follow their rules and pretend to pray or whatever shit. If they're in my house, they follow my rules, and praying is not disallowed, but they cannot and will not force me to join in.
I'm extremely uncomfortable with prayer, sacraments, etc, and I think it's an incredible waste of time. However, if I'm in a religious person's house, I follow their rules and pretend to pray or whatever shit. If they're in my house, they follow my rules, and praying is not disallowed, but they cannot and will not force me to join in.
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I'm not familiar to your situation, but it's understandable. I'm definitely not familiar with your family, but it sounds like only your brother will be a cock about this. The rest depends on how well your parents can tolerate the fact that their child wasn't suckered into their shit. Don't be ashamed in the least of being quiet about it just to save yourself from the bullshit that you will likely have to deal with.
Then again, I'm assuming you still live with your parents. If not, if I were you, I would not bother compromising my integrity just to conform to their stupid bullshit.
Then again, I'm assuming you still live with your parents. If not, if I were you, I would not bother compromising my integrity just to conform to their stupid bullshit.
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Iamnotchrishansen
Jiggy Blackson
Rbz wrote...
I'm not familiar to your situation, but it's understandable. I'm definitely not familiar with your family, but it sounds like only your brother will be a cock about this. The rest depends on how well your parents can tolerate the fact that their child wasn't suckered into their shit. Don't be ashamed in the least of being quiet about it just to save yourself from the bullshit that you will likely have to deal with.Then again, I'm assuming you still live with your parents. If not, if I were you, I would not bother compromising my integrity just to conform to their stupid bullshit.
Unfortunately, that's that case. I am living with my grandparent. Sure I help her with a good majority of the bills and all but, I told her my non belief and she threatened to kick me out. I don't have anywhere else to go. That pisses me off. How the fuck can a Christian (someone who is supposed to love another as they love themselves, yeah I was once a Christian too) not accept someone elses non belief? When I announce my Atheism to someone I just leave it at that. I don't Anti-evangelize so, what the hell?
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I know this feeling well. No one in my immediate family shares my rejection of religion (besides my uncle whom I rarely see) and it does create some awkward moments at times. Around the holidays I usually just suck it up and play along as to not piss anybody off. My mother is familiar with my viewpoints, but she doesn't like it. Naturally. I think a lot of how you respond, depends on how well you know your relatives and the situation you're in. I see no reason to upset numerous relatives of mine at a joyous gathering, thus I put it aside for a day.
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Don't get me wrong, but if what you say is true, your family is just a bunch of dicks who value a possibly inexistent God more than you. And they're not even religious, they're zealous and obsessed with their religion so much as to actually condemn you for having you own different thoughts. Faith cannot be imposed... if it is forced, then it's not faith of any kind.
If I was in your position I'd honestly tell them that I don't that much of a damn and that they're a bunch of shallow, narrow-minded hypocrites by trying to impede your free will, which is actually against the basics of christianity.
If I was in your position I'd honestly tell them that I don't that much of a damn and that they're a bunch of shallow, narrow-minded hypocrites by trying to impede your free will, which is actually against the basics of christianity.
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I can't say that i can relate to your experience OP but your beliefs are your own choice so if people don't like it, fk them. But since you probably would get kicked out of the house for your beliefs, just bear with it for now until you can live on your own or something without being restricted to other people's beliefs.
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animefreak_usa wrote...
I was excommunicated from the holy church. I'm trying to get stricken from the rolls of the Church. I've already done premarital sex, baby killing (using contraception), taking the Lord's name in vain...etc. What else do I need to do?!?!?! Write the freaking pope?
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Cruz
Dope Stone Lion
I'm in a football team where everyday before practice everyone gets on a knee and player or a coach say a team prayer. I'm never really uncomfortable when they do it, although only 1 close friend of mine on the team knows I'm agnostic. Personally, when I told my family they were a bit upset, but after a while it was really more like whatever.
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animefreak_usa
Child of Samael
Nekohime wrote...
animefreak_usa wrote...
I was excommunicated from the holy church. I'm trying to get stricken from the rolls of the Church. I've already done premarital sex, baby killing (using contraception), taking the Lord's name in vain...etc. What else do I need to do?!?!?! Write the freaking pope?
The parish priest saw me at a Pro choice rally... that and i took a swing at him after he denied my friend family a christian rights at his funeral(he killed himself). He had to be cremated so we can sneak him in to his mother's grave.
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Sometimes you just have to suck it up. i have been anatheist since i was about eight or ten years old, and i learned a long time ago that most "true belivers" are not going to change their minds. no matter how much logic you throw at them or how many contradictions and other obvious BS you quote from their own mythology. i find it's much easier to just smile to your self and let them be. just let it go. espescialy if they hold some kind of authority over you.
if they keep bugging you, learn their mythology inside out and use it against them. if you use their own arguments against them, they will think twice before trying to screw with you again.
laviticus is a favorite that is often brought up only in small pieces, but if you look at all of it, most is straight lunacy. ask them when the last time thay sacraficed a calf to their god, or if the clothes they are wearing are made of mixxed fibers. there are so many pieces you can use to beat them back.
if you absolutely must speak up, keep calm, and try not to be insulting.
if they keep bugging you, learn their mythology inside out and use it against them. if you use their own arguments against them, they will think twice before trying to screw with you again.
laviticus is a favorite that is often brought up only in small pieces, but if you look at all of it, most is straight lunacy. ask them when the last time thay sacraficed a calf to their god, or if the clothes they are wearing are made of mixxed fibers. there are so many pieces you can use to beat them back.
if you absolutely must speak up, keep calm, and try not to be insulting.
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Iamnotchrishansen wrote...
Unfortunately, that's that case. I am living with my grandparent. Sure I help her with a good majority of the bills and all but, I told her my non belief and she threatened to kick me out. I don't have anywhere else to go. That pisses me off. How the fuck can a Christian (someone who is supposed to love another as they love themselves, yeah I was once a Christian too) not accept someone elses non belief? When I announce my Atheism to someone I just leave it at that. I don't Anti-evangelize so, what the hell?Plan A is a no-go, you spilled the truth. You already did the next best thing: telling them and then acting like nothing happened.
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Iamnotchrishansen wrote...
Unfortunately, that's that case. I am living with my grandparent. Sure I help her with a good majority of the bills and all but, I told her my non belief and she threatened to kick me out. I don't have anywhere else to go. That pisses me off. How the fuck can a Christian (someone who is supposed to love another as they love themselves, yeah I was once a Christian too) not accept someone elses non belief? When I announce my Atheism to someone I just leave it at that. I don't Anti-evangelize so, what the hell?
Wow. From what I know from my former church teachings, you're supposed to not accept the non-belief, but accept the person anyway. Hate the sin, love the sinner, so to speak. However, some people are just haters whether they have religion or not.
Teh bf's family (the ones who know I'm atheist, anyway) still like me, but they try to evangelize and get me to pray with them and all that shit. It's annoying, but like I said, when I'm in their house, I just follow along.
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OK all you true believers out there. Just chill. This is my personal opinion.
There are, as near as I can count (gave up finally) at least a few hundred "organized" religions. The Baptists alone have at least 20. All of whom deny the existence of the others. Amazingly they all have one thing in common
"If you do not accept our faith ""the only true one"" you are destined to go to hell"
The faith I was raised in, and no longer practice, does not believe in a heaven or hell
And realistically if there is. I probably have a chair of nails right next to the fires
Logic dictates that they are all wrong and probably the motivation is financial, not spiritual. all those TV evangelists have to be a scam. and look at some of the houses of prayer that cost millions and millions to build and maintain. The Crystal Cathedral comes to mind I would think that if they were true followers of the alleged faith, That money would be better spent helping people in need (Are you listening Pope?)
If there is a "God" and If it is necessary to pray to him or her or whatever. I would think this "God" wouldn't much care where you prayed. In a field or house or in the bathtub. (I know a lot of people that pray while driving. you can hear them every time the traffic gets heavy)
As far as family/friends and those who knock on my door. I just nod my head
When I am at someones house and they pray. I bow my head and mentally recite the Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner or something similar.
This country was supposedly founded on the principle of Freedom of Religion I think that includes the freedom not to believe.
Sorry about the wall of words folks
P
There are, as near as I can count (gave up finally) at least a few hundred "organized" religions. The Baptists alone have at least 20. All of whom deny the existence of the others. Amazingly they all have one thing in common
"If you do not accept our faith ""the only true one"" you are destined to go to hell"
The faith I was raised in, and no longer practice, does not believe in a heaven or hell
And realistically if there is. I probably have a chair of nails right next to the fires
Logic dictates that they are all wrong and probably the motivation is financial, not spiritual. all those TV evangelists have to be a scam. and look at some of the houses of prayer that cost millions and millions to build and maintain. The Crystal Cathedral comes to mind I would think that if they were true followers of the alleged faith, That money would be better spent helping people in need (Are you listening Pope?)
If there is a "God" and If it is necessary to pray to him or her or whatever. I would think this "God" wouldn't much care where you prayed. In a field or house or in the bathtub. (I know a lot of people that pray while driving. you can hear them every time the traffic gets heavy)
As far as family/friends and those who knock on my door. I just nod my head
When I am at someones house and they pray. I bow my head and mentally recite the Rhyme of the Ancient Mariner or something similar.
This country was supposedly founded on the principle of Freedom of Religion I think that includes the freedom not to believe.
Sorry about the wall of words folks
P
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My family is very religious as well, but their general reaction to my lack of faith is disappointment rather than anger or anything. I'd been non-theist for years before pretty much anyone in my family knew; not because I was hiding it, but because it seemed like such a natural thing for me that I never thought it was a big enough deal to bring up. I thought they basically got it from my behavior and my fairly regular talks about evolution and how even a theist should believe in it and to not to is like ignoring gravity.... but they were still all aghast when it first happened to come up in conversation that I don't believe in God. They don't really bother me much with it anymore, but I also don't talk to most of my family anymore. Occasionally, my grandma sends me an email about how she prays for me, or someone sends me some Christian propaganda email or something. But other than that, I just sort of stand there when they pray before a meal at family get-togethers and whatnot.
I'm very much the black sheep of my family, though, so I have to avoid talking about religion or politics with most of them so no one gets too angry. They are all very Christian Conservative. The kind of people who go to the Creationist museum and think, "yeah, this makes sense." The kind of people who put bumper stickers on their cars that say, "Obama Biden/ Osama Bin Laden; too close for comfort." and mean it.
Although it's been healthy for me too, because it's helped me realize that faith and fear do things to people, and people don't have to be dumb to believe completely retarded things.
I'm very much the black sheep of my family, though, so I have to avoid talking about religion or politics with most of them so no one gets too angry. They are all very Christian Conservative. The kind of people who go to the Creationist museum and think, "yeah, this makes sense." The kind of people who put bumper stickers on their cars that say, "Obama Biden/ Osama Bin Laden; too close for comfort." and mean it.
Although it's been healthy for me too, because it's helped me realize that faith and fear do things to people, and people don't have to be dumb to believe completely retarded things.
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The question you must ask yourself first is whether or not you got sufficient arguments to prove your point. Just saying "IMO religion is not sound" will most certainly result in a quarrel. And starting a debate out of nowhere will only make them feel as if their personal integrity was threatened. You should just try to shake on their believes with scientific arguments every now and then without outing yourself as an atheist. This is especially important since you want them to listen what you have to say without any prejudice (and prejudice against atheists seems to be very distinctive in your family).
What to do:
1. Educate yourself until you can refute any theist/creationist argument.
2. Practice arguing with theists/creationists on the Internet.
3. Take your family's believes apart step by step.
4. Do NOT out yourself as atheist!
What to do:
1. Educate yourself until you can refute any theist/creationist argument.
2. Practice arguing with theists/creationists on the Internet.
3. Take your family's believes apart step by step.
4. Do NOT out yourself as atheist!
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Iamnotchrishansen
Jiggy Blackson
Tachyon wrote...
The question you must ask yourself first is whether or not you got sufficient arguments to prove your point. Just saying "IMO religion is not sound" will most certainly result in a quarrel. And starting a debate out of nowhere will only make them feel as if their personal integrity was threatened. You should just try to shake on their believes with scientific arguments every now and then without outing yourself as an atheist. This is especially important since you want them to listen what you have to say without any prejudice (and prejudice against atheists seems to be very distinctive in your family). What to do:
1. Educate yourself until you can refute any theist/creationist argument.
2. Practice arguing with theists/creationists on the Internet.
3. Take your family's believes apart step by step.
4. Do NOT out yourself as atheist!
I already taken those steps to a certain degree. I have a notebook full of points that will pretty much rip Christianity to shreds. I suck at arguing so the next time my grandmother or any Theist comes against me I have what I call the "anti-Bible". I actually sent a Christian crying once, I consider my self too gentle at times so I felt sorry for the guy.
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Iamnotchrishansen wrote...
I am one of those people and my friends and family are all theists. I try to keep it to myself and go as far as to "pray" during family meetings. I fear that if I break it to anyone they are going to hate me. What's worse is that my Grandmother is a Clergywoman at a church. Another sad thing is my little brother and I are really close and he HATES atheists. How should I break it to them? Or should I remain silent about my non-belief? Can anyone relate to this?I experienced different situation. but what I can say be your self. why do you hide your atheist. for my self, I always say I'm theist so fuck off with your atheist.
religion is what one believe in his or her heart. and faith is not something you can forced. so don't Fucked up too long just say hey Im Atheist Motherfucker.
damn wishy washy
oh by the way Abraham had a fight with his father about his believe. so why don't you?
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Takerial
Lovable Teddy Bear
Another thread concerning atheism and religion?
Good thing, cause there's no other one in serious dis....oh wait.
Good thing, cause there's no other one in serious dis....oh wait.