[Summer Contest Entry 2012] The Three Unforgettable Days
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The Three Unforgettable Days
Funnily enough, I don't like to get out as much as others. Outside the comfort of my home, that is. For the whole summer, I planned on just laying here on my bed the whole time, browsing through the Fakku website and seeing some recent, interesting, and really awesome content that the guys and girls share. Those plans changed whenever a good friend told me that he had an extra plane ticket heading towards my favorite foreign country: Japan! This was the opportunity that couldn't have a "no" as an answer!
The following day was a success. Boarding the luggage, getting on the plane, landing in Japan, etc. It was all successful! This isn't what I'm here to talk about, though. I'm here to talk about three specific days out of the two weeks I stayed there. Three unforgettable days...
Day One: July 7th
The main reason why this particular day was unforgettable was because of Tanabata, or the Star Festival. At the hotel I was staying at, there was a bamboo tree in a corner. I decided to get a slip of long and narrow colored paper from the counter, write my wish down in Japanese writing as best as I could, and hang it up on one of the branches. It might not sound like much, but it's worth doing because it's Japanese tradition. My wish was this: "I wish all of the major problems in the world were resolved". I could have done another one based around personal romantic aspirations, but I decided not to.
After that, I decided to head up to the room I was staying in and practice some more Japanese speech and kanji. Of course, me coming from America and everything, it's not easy, nor should it ever be, but since practice with both said things were the filler of my free time back in my homeland, it was enough to have kind of short, but decent conversations with Japanese citizens who don't know much English, which made me feel proud of myself.
Although the highlight of this day was Tanabata, this was also the day that I had a breakthrough when it came to talking to people in the native language here. Even if it was a simple "konnichiwa" or "sayonara", it still made me feel proud to be able to talk to them in some way.
Before I knew it, it was nighttime, which seems unusual for a guy that originates from a country that's across the ocean. When I first came here, it was a very weird transition in time, but I accustomed to it very quick. So, on the floor with a comfortable futon to sleep on, I look forward to the days ahead as I look up at the ceiling and, eventually, fall asleep...
Day Two: July 10th
July 10th. A few days since Tanabata. After waking up and having a good breakfast, I was wondering what I was going to do with my love life. "Will I meet some girl here that finds something adorable about me?" That's what I thought in my mind for a few hours. Later in the day, something happened. It was as if I wrote down an extra wish for Tanabata, hung it up on one of the branches of the bamboo tree, and, somehow, it came true. A wish containing personal romantic aspirations.
That's right. I met a girl who seemed to love me because I'm from a different country. To be truthful, I loved her as well because of the cute appeal in most Japanese women. It was a nice feeling, especially when we spent most of the day together, doing random stuff in the district.
She told me that she was celebrating Tanabata the same way I was. After getting to know each other for a little while, I told her my main wish: "I wish all of the major problems in the world were resolved". That's when she told me that she saw a wish similar to mine and asked me what color the slip of paper was. I told her that it was blue. That's when it struck me. We were staying in the same hotel!
Later, it became nighttime and I was already on the futon, under the covers. I was going to fall asleep, but the lover went out of her room and came into mine, coming under the covers with me! She was snuggling with me for a little bit because she felt lonely in her own room. I could already see where this was going. Was I going to lose my virginity to this girl? The answer to that question was "yes" because she was giving me some signals, like moaning in my ear and dry-humping my leg.
I said, "okay". She pulled down my pants and underwear, went under the sheets, and gave me the "oral sensation". After a few minutes had passed, my load had been unloaded and my sticky cum went into her mouth (and she swallowed it).
A few minutes after that, I completely undressed her, played with her soft breasts, and gave her some "oral sensation" and she came (in a shorter time than I did) all over my face. What a horny girl. I don't blame her, though because I was as horny as she was. She wanted to feel my stiff erection deep inside her as a final treat. So, to make a long story short, it was a night full of erotic intentions. Moaning, orgasms, and lots of cum. What a really nice way to end the day.
Day Three: July 16th
Nearly a week after meeting the girl of my dreams, I thought it would be a nice time to get her a gift. I still remember the night when I lost my virginity and the aftermath of that awesome feeling. Her laying on top of me.
I decided to go to a shop nearby and get a batch of roses for her whenever she wasn't around. Whenever I bought them, I decided to write a letter to her, reading this passage: "It has been a very nice time here, but, unfortunately, it's almost time for me to go back to America. I just want you to know that I love you with all of my heart, and I wish I could be with you some more. Love, your admirer".
She came back to her hotel room to find the roses and the letter, and it was so sad to see her cry so much. It's like she had never cried so much in her lifetime until now. There is some good news to this, though. After some major persuasion towards her parents via a phone call, they decided to let her come to America to live with me. It cheered her up, and it cheered me up as well.
When I returned home with my new girlfriend, I wanted to teach her some major English. After one session, she gave me a long kiss on the lips. I'll never forget this because of the event that occurred after it. After that lengthy kiss, I decided to turn on the news, a few of the headlines reading: "Crime rates decrease worldwide", "Scientific studies show a decrease of violent intentions in some people", and "Peace has a meaning now because of an unknown event". I think my wish came true...
The End
Funnily enough, I don't like to get out as much as others. Outside the comfort of my home, that is. For the whole summer, I planned on just laying here on my bed the whole time, browsing through the Fakku website and seeing some recent, interesting, and really awesome content that the guys and girls share. Those plans changed whenever a good friend told me that he had an extra plane ticket heading towards my favorite foreign country: Japan! This was the opportunity that couldn't have a "no" as an answer!
The following day was a success. Boarding the luggage, getting on the plane, landing in Japan, etc. It was all successful! This isn't what I'm here to talk about, though. I'm here to talk about three specific days out of the two weeks I stayed there. Three unforgettable days...
Day One: July 7th
The main reason why this particular day was unforgettable was because of Tanabata, or the Star Festival. At the hotel I was staying at, there was a bamboo tree in a corner. I decided to get a slip of long and narrow colored paper from the counter, write my wish down in Japanese writing as best as I could, and hang it up on one of the branches. It might not sound like much, but it's worth doing because it's Japanese tradition. My wish was this: "I wish all of the major problems in the world were resolved". I could have done another one based around personal romantic aspirations, but I decided not to.
After that, I decided to head up to the room I was staying in and practice some more Japanese speech and kanji. Of course, me coming from America and everything, it's not easy, nor should it ever be, but since practice with both said things were the filler of my free time back in my homeland, it was enough to have kind of short, but decent conversations with Japanese citizens who don't know much English, which made me feel proud of myself.
Although the highlight of this day was Tanabata, this was also the day that I had a breakthrough when it came to talking to people in the native language here. Even if it was a simple "konnichiwa" or "sayonara", it still made me feel proud to be able to talk to them in some way.
Before I knew it, it was nighttime, which seems unusual for a guy that originates from a country that's across the ocean. When I first came here, it was a very weird transition in time, but I accustomed to it very quick. So, on the floor with a comfortable futon to sleep on, I look forward to the days ahead as I look up at the ceiling and, eventually, fall asleep...
Day Two: July 10th
July 10th. A few days since Tanabata. After waking up and having a good breakfast, I was wondering what I was going to do with my love life. "Will I meet some girl here that finds something adorable about me?" That's what I thought in my mind for a few hours. Later in the day, something happened. It was as if I wrote down an extra wish for Tanabata, hung it up on one of the branches of the bamboo tree, and, somehow, it came true. A wish containing personal romantic aspirations.
That's right. I met a girl who seemed to love me because I'm from a different country. To be truthful, I loved her as well because of the cute appeal in most Japanese women. It was a nice feeling, especially when we spent most of the day together, doing random stuff in the district.
She told me that she was celebrating Tanabata the same way I was. After getting to know each other for a little while, I told her my main wish: "I wish all of the major problems in the world were resolved". That's when she told me that she saw a wish similar to mine and asked me what color the slip of paper was. I told her that it was blue. That's when it struck me. We were staying in the same hotel!
Later, it became nighttime and I was already on the futon, under the covers. I was going to fall asleep, but the lover went out of her room and came into mine, coming under the covers with me! She was snuggling with me for a little bit because she felt lonely in her own room. I could already see where this was going. Was I going to lose my virginity to this girl? The answer to that question was "yes" because she was giving me some signals, like moaning in my ear and dry-humping my leg.
I said, "okay". She pulled down my pants and underwear, went under the sheets, and gave me the "oral sensation". After a few minutes had passed, my load had been unloaded and my sticky cum went into her mouth (and she swallowed it).
A few minutes after that, I completely undressed her, played with her soft breasts, and gave her some "oral sensation" and she came (in a shorter time than I did) all over my face. What a horny girl. I don't blame her, though because I was as horny as she was. She wanted to feel my stiff erection deep inside her as a final treat. So, to make a long story short, it was a night full of erotic intentions. Moaning, orgasms, and lots of cum. What a really nice way to end the day.
Day Three: July 16th
Nearly a week after meeting the girl of my dreams, I thought it would be a nice time to get her a gift. I still remember the night when I lost my virginity and the aftermath of that awesome feeling. Her laying on top of me.
I decided to go to a shop nearby and get a batch of roses for her whenever she wasn't around. Whenever I bought them, I decided to write a letter to her, reading this passage: "It has been a very nice time here, but, unfortunately, it's almost time for me to go back to America. I just want you to know that I love you with all of my heart, and I wish I could be with you some more. Love, your admirer".
She came back to her hotel room to find the roses and the letter, and it was so sad to see her cry so much. It's like she had never cried so much in her lifetime until now. There is some good news to this, though. After some major persuasion towards her parents via a phone call, they decided to let her come to America to live with me. It cheered her up, and it cheered me up as well.
When I returned home with my new girlfriend, I wanted to teach her some major English. After one session, she gave me a long kiss on the lips. I'll never forget this because of the event that occurred after it. After that lengthy kiss, I decided to turn on the news, a few of the headlines reading: "Crime rates decrease worldwide", "Scientific studies show a decrease of violent intentions in some people", and "Peace has a meaning now because of an unknown event". I think my wish came true...
The End
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I really like this piece, the way you worded it is very close to how I hope my first experience in Japan will be and it is like a short tale of how I hope my first love will turn out. Thanks for this amazing piece, it really caught my attention!
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Miyake wrote...
I really like this piece, the way you worded it is very close to how I hope my first experience in Japan will be and it is like a short tale of how I hope my first love will turn out. Thanks for this amazing piece, it really caught my attention!Thanks! I had fun typing this piece!
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Cinia Pacifica
Ojou-sama Writer
Ah, one of the overly positive and a type of story that would be categorized as a 'vanilla' story by the other readers... or me? Lol. Thank you for the submission!
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Cinia Pacifica wrote...
Ah, one of the overly positive and a type of story that would be categorized as a 'vanilla' story by the other readers... or me? Lol. Thank you for the submission!Thank you so much!
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"Peace has a meaning now because of an unknown event” (This gave me a good laugh, really. How can a broad word such as PEACE, be announced on TV throughout the world? There can never be peace, and the narrator’s wish will never come true. Well, that’s just me.)
Anyway, I loved how you neatly written your entry in such a way that is not literally painful in the eyes. A plus point to that. Second, I appreciate the simplicity of your work, and it’s a good thing because it’s a writing even beginners can comprehend. Third, I love the character’s perspective. It was so masculine yet it’s not that brusque (translate that to a nice character formatting.)
On the negative part, you should’ve given us more of the imagery of what was happening with those three unforgettable days. Say, you should’ve described the star festival furthermore (the dresses, the stalls, the fireworks, the atmosphere), or better yet, given us more hint of what happened that erotic night. (You should’ve used some of the remaining words for that). You lacked with the details, which made me say: “That’s it? What’s so unforgettable about that?”
Also, I noticed about the interval between the dates that occurred. At first, by reading the title, I expected the days to be consecutive, but it didn’t occur. I was thinking, perhaps there are more unforgettable days that happened with the characters life? If the title would be THE THREE UNFORGETTABLE DAYS AFTER/DURING MY VISIT IN JAPAN, it would make sense.
Anyway, I give to you my sincerest regards.
Anyway, I loved how you neatly written your entry in such a way that is not literally painful in the eyes. A plus point to that. Second, I appreciate the simplicity of your work, and it’s a good thing because it’s a writing even beginners can comprehend. Third, I love the character’s perspective. It was so masculine yet it’s not that brusque (translate that to a nice character formatting.)
On the negative part, you should’ve given us more of the imagery of what was happening with those three unforgettable days. Say, you should’ve described the star festival furthermore (the dresses, the stalls, the fireworks, the atmosphere), or better yet, given us more hint of what happened that erotic night. (You should’ve used some of the remaining words for that). You lacked with the details, which made me say: “That’s it? What’s so unforgettable about that?”
Also, I noticed about the interval between the dates that occurred. At first, by reading the title, I expected the days to be consecutive, but it didn’t occur. I was thinking, perhaps there are more unforgettable days that happened with the characters life? If the title would be THE THREE UNFORGETTABLE DAYS AFTER/DURING MY VISIT IN JAPAN, it would make sense.
Anyway, I give to you my sincerest regards.
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@Carlisle - Thanks for the criticism! I'll take this opprotunity to throw in my two cents about this story...
First of all, I appreciate your liking of the simplicity put into it. I'm not a major writer (yet), but some people recognize my writing like that.
Second, I have no idea why I put the whole "peace" statement at the end. I also have no idea why I didn't add any detail in some areas. It feels like I need to change a few things, but another part of me says "leave it as it is".
Third, I didn't want to make the story too short or too long, and this is a pretty average length to me. I can't remember the number of words inputed (I think it was nearly at 1250). If you think that there could be some detail implemented, i'll add it only if it's necessary.
Fourth, and finally, I made it to where the main character had to choose out of the two weeks what three days meant the most to him.
So, once again, thanks for the criticism!
First of all, I appreciate your liking of the simplicity put into it. I'm not a major writer (yet), but some people recognize my writing like that.
Second, I have no idea why I put the whole "peace" statement at the end. I also have no idea why I didn't add any detail in some areas. It feels like I need to change a few things, but another part of me says "leave it as it is".
Third, I didn't want to make the story too short or too long, and this is a pretty average length to me. I can't remember the number of words inputed (I think it was nearly at 1250). If you think that there could be some detail implemented, i'll add it only if it's necessary.
Fourth, and finally, I made it to where the main character had to choose out of the two weeks what three days meant the most to him.
So, once again, thanks for the criticism!
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I really liked it, it was fun to read.
It's just that when you mentioned Tanabata, I expected a reference to Haruhi...
It's just that when you mentioned Tanabata, I expected a reference to Haruhi...