I noticed one thing, that I always try to avoid...
For example the line at 6:59
"I-I'm sorry, it feels so good I..."
Nothing at all is wrong with the line, however I find to include stutters into the translation do nothing productive, and if anything only hinder the viewers ability to read the line...
Thing is I feel you do not need to include them for the viewer to understand that stuttering is going on as they can hear it in the japanese, regardless of whether or not they know japanese.
Watch it the other way around and it feels awkward. Plus its standard subbing practice.