Exactly. It's one of the hardest things to understand. So instead of thinking hard, try to understand it. If you think it's hard, it is hard. If you think it's not hard, then it's not hard. But in reality, it is hard.
It can't be hard and not hard at the same time. Because if it is harder than what is hard, then the hard isn't as hard as you think. The main thing is if you think to hard and make it seem hard then the actual hard is harder than what it was. So in hind sight; Just stroke it to be hard and ignore it to be not so hard. There now, that wasn't so hard was it?