writing a story.
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@Solidshark I'll tried to read boring boy but the thread was really long now, it might take a while for me finish reading all of it. but of-course I'll definitely try to add a story there. I got work tomorrow so maybe next week I'll add a story.
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Lughost
the Lugoat
SolidShark wrote...
RealityBell wrote...
Ryssen wrote...
SolidShark wrote...
Ryssen wrote...
Write a story about a traumatized kid who goes deaf, dumb and blind after witnessing his father kill his mother's lover (because she thought the father was dead). His parents unaware of his disabilities, they send him to his relatives where he is tortured and molested by them because of his helplessness. Little Tommy is then introduced to a pimp called Hawker who promises he can cure the dumb, the blind and the deaf. Tommy later meets The Acid Queen and her hallucinogenic drugs to try to treat his disabilities- with no success. Nevertheless, he subsequently gains public attention by his curious interest in pinball.Now you have copied half the story of Tommy. Congratulations.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED! I'll continue from there.
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Tommy felt an old pinball machine, confusing it's texture for the table similar to that of his room. He breathed in to smell for his father and mother. The only smelled bitter smoke in the air. He had an expression of worry, he was lost again. He stretched his arms aimlessly for someone nearby. Nobody. The world was an immense place again. He paused for a moment, and immidiately realized that he had been abandoned, again.
He crawled on all fours feeling the floor for some sense of direction. He was terrified. Thoughts questioning if he was still alive hit him to the point of heing unbearable.
Actually he's cured from his disabilities after his mother destroys his mirror. After that I think he's sent to a campus. I don't remember. Been a while since I last listened to it.
hmm okay L'll try It.
As Tommy crawled on the floor, he paused to feel the pinball that was on his hand. He started remembering what was life before this nightmare happened. As snow fell on his head, he remembered the day where the three of them, had the happiest Christmas Eve. Mom was cooking, Dad was sitting on the chair smoking, reading the news paper. He remembered his dad looking at him with a tender smile.
Seems like everything was warm before that. In tommy's mind he's thinking where did this nightmare start? Why is this all happening? Tears shed down to his cheeks. Suddenly a sharp stabbing pain in the head came to Tommy, as he began agonizing in pain, seeing some strange image. He was remembering something. As he remembers more, the pain turns worse. He feels like his head will explode from the pain. He saw an image of his father and mother arguing of something. His mother was yelling at his father and pointing at a paper. His mother cried desperately and hugged his father. They embraced each other for what seemed eternal. Another image appeared his father sitting on the table, seeming to have a ton of problems. His father throwed all the things in the table, then crying in tears. Then, he saw his parents fighting. It seems to him like he's in a dream that has as a woman that came to the house. The woman and his father was arguing after that. His father pulled a gun and shot the woman in the head. Then a big tidal wave was destroying the house. Tommy was awakened due a splash of water that came from a carriage wheel.
i really want to put more to it like saying that tommy got mad and clench his teeth but yeah I'm really getting sleepy.. :D lol
Fixed that for you.
He was doused in the icy cold stenchy water. It smelled rotten. Where did the water come from he wonder? Why would anyone do that to him? Was it someone who knew him?
He sat there for what felt eternal. He was starving, surendering from living. Suddenly, he felt an unknown sweet aroma followed with a warm embrace.
This is funny because you made a mistake earlier.
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Lughost
the Lugoat
SolidShark wrote...
Grenouille88 wrote...
This is funny because you made a mistake earlier.Yeah, I noticed. Irony is beautiful, isn't it? Still, can't it blame on myself this time. The touchscreen and the lack of spellcheck was at fault this time.
In example, I used an h instead of a b, this being just above the b, causing hell. As a matter of fact, I just spelled "this" as "tbis", and "of fact" as "or fact".
not an excuse
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Lughost
the Lugoat
SolidShark wrote...
Grenouille88 wrote...
SolidShark wrote...
Grenouille88 wrote...
This is funny because you made a mistake earlier.Yeah, I noticed. Irony is beautiful, isn't it? Still, can't it blame on myself this time. The touchscreen and the lack of spellcheck was at fault this time.
In example, I used an h instead of a b, this being just above the b, causing hell. As a matter of fact, I just spelled "this" as "tbis", and "of fact" as "or fact".
not an excuse
I'll be twice as careful from now on.
you had better be
also: learn what irony actually is