I have numerous insignificant things I dislike about my parents' mannerisms which, when putting up with them for so long, are beginning to get on my tits.
Dad:
- Turns the volume down/off on the TV every chance he gets. We haven't had the TV long, probably about half a year, and already the Volume buttons on the remote are worn away.
- Watches old war films nobody's heard of.
- Has selective hearing. That's annoying on its own.
- Keeps using nautical slang (Galley, for the kitchen. Port-hole, for a window etc) and keeps telling sea-stories of questionable origin.
- Is a hoarder, won't let us chuck out his mother's stuff which is useless and/or damaged, so it can't be sold for good money.
- His personal hygeine is disgusting. He showers once every 2 weeks, occasionally shits himself and somehow manages to make his clothes and sheets smell like a fucking farm.
- Is lazy as fuck and is a worse procrastinator than I am. Keeps using his bad knee as an excuse to not do anything when he doesn't even excercise it, even though he has to on Doctor's orders.
Mum:
- Has a high pitched voice which only gets louder when she's on the phone to my nan. She doesn't seem to notice when it gets earsplittingly high pitched.
- When Jeremy Kyle's on she always has to make her opinion, which is "that she doesn't know how people can live like that", known. So far I average about 6 times per airing.
- She's incredibly doting. She offers everyone food or drink, even when they've already refused 4 times. When she does it to me or asks if I've had anything to drink today, I keep having to remind her how old I am. Literally, I quote: Sorry, how old am I?
- She's paranoid. She keeps looking out the window and bullshits about her friends and neighbours because she thinks they're out to get her and yet she's all lovely and kind to their face.
- Once she thinks of something, she won't stop thinking about it until she either sees it through or until proven wrong.
For example when I was in school, she was convinced I needed an entire pencil case for exams when all I needed was a pen. I told her numerous times I didn't need it. What did she do? She came all the way to the school and actually got someone in Reception to give it to me, and as it turned out I didn't need it as I predicted.
For a more recent example, for the past 2 weeks she's been convinced there's a rat in the house and shouted at us when we left doors open, for fear it'd escape elsewhere. The cat caught it and I managed to get it off her, and I confirmed it was just a mouse.
- And finally on top of her earsplittingly loud voice, she just doesn't shut up. She's always speaking her thoughts. It is really quite difficult to drown out the sound of her voice with music or whatever.
Did I mention that they both bicker at the smallest of things? Normally when my mum asks my dad to do something he flies off the handle. Then she rubs him up the wrong way and it goes round like that in a vicious cycle.
Putting up with this crap all year long gets to me sometimes.