Porno Instead of Sex Ed?

A scene in The 40-Year-Old Virgin got me to thinking. In the scene, Steve Carell's character is looking at a model of a vagina, and it splits open, and he says to himself, "Where does the penis go?" My first thought was, "Dude, just watch some porn, and you'll figure it out."

Then it hit me. Sex ed in middle and high school taught me virtually nothing. Everything I know about sex, I learned from porn. In sex ed, they'd show the horrible diagrams of the inside of the vagina, the tubes and bags and all that, but that shit is meaningless when it comes to looking at a real woman. But porn shows everything (at least, the right type of porn). It shows where the penis goes, what a vagina really looks like, and some great positions. Furthermore, while the term "oral sex" was used in my sex ed classes, it was never explained what oral sex exactly is. Again, porn is the real teacher, showing what oral sex is, how to do it, what parts to emphasize, etc.

If I have a kid, I'm pretty sure when he/she gets old enough, I'm going to forgo all the stupid classes and just show the kid some fucking porno. Not for enjoyment (though I wouldn't blame the kid if he/she deposited the memories of the porn for masturbation material), but to show what sex really is, instead of showing a bunch of stupid pictures and turning it into a biology lesson.

Does anybody agree? Does anybody think I'm crazy? Thoughts?

I'm pretty sure you are crazy, but I can't really think of anything rational to say to counter your argument. I mean, you have a point, porn can tell ya pretty much anything you need to know. Considering the bajillion types of pornos, I wouldn't be surprised if there isn't already a specific porno that sort of mocks a sex-ed video. Instructional but all sexy in its design, possibly with a hot girl in glasses and nothing else. ...or something like that. But yeah, I'm with ya on this one.

I'm not sure what sex ed class you went to, ShaggyJebus, but at least that basic fact was taught to us. Sex ed doesn't teach you how to have sex, but teaches what it's about and the surrounding circumstances. It isn't and was never meant to teach teenagers how to have sex. That kinda of stuff can be found anywhere from the net to even the Cosmopolitan.

Now if I wanted my child to know what sex is really about, it's porn and hentai to go.

Well, isn't sexual education supposed to actually involve some education about sex?

I admit, the sex ed classes my school had were pathetic, unbelievably so, and other sex ed classes undoubtedly taught a lot more than the ones I had did. But still, I've only heard of sex ed classes teaching about STDs and safe sex. Isn't it important for teenagers to know the right way to have sex? After all, we can't say that we want teenagers to not have sex, because it's going to happen, whether adults like it or not. Why not show the teenagers how to do it?

To sum it up simply - doesn't it seem weird that a guy (let's say he never watches porn, somehow) could go through sex ed and understand that he should wear a condom, but not know where exactly to put his dick? God help them if the girl and the boy are both virgins.

Admittedly, sex isn't that hard, but it can be a very unpleasant experience if either party doesn't know what they're doing, and it seems strange to me that teenagers learn more about how to have sex from porn, which they cannot legally buy or look at, than from sex ed courses, which the government and schools pay for.

I think the movie The Girl Next Door actually dealt with this subject, with the people making a sex ed porno movie. That's the sort of thing that's really needed. Because porn still isn't 100% truth, and it can be hard to find the middle ground between the nothing that sex ed classes teach and the extreme stuff that porn teaches.

Then again, maybe showing kids how to have sex would make more of them start having sex. An interesting thought.

There's no such thing like Sex ed in my class.... so yeah, i know sex from hentai/porn.

In school, sex ed and health class was about the attributes to sex.

Back in 4th grade, all the girls got separated from the boys and were told about girls getting their period, blah blah blah

Same with boys (Though I'm not really sure what the extent of what you guys learned) I'm gonna guess puberty, unexplained boners, etc. I dunno.

In sex education, you learned what sex was about, not how to do it. Do you have any idea how much trouble the school systems would get if parents found out the schools were teaching minors how to have sex?

This isn't Monty Python.

I O U +rep for that. :lol:

Sex ed isn't about how to have sex, but shouldn't it be? At least, a little? Safe sex is taught because people understand that teenagers are going to have sex; if they're going to have sex anyway, why not teach them how to do it? Getting hot and heavy with a girl and then not knowing what to do has got to be really fucking embarrassing. If nothing else, sex ed could at least teach kids a few ways to have fun without sticking the dick in the vagina (and I don't just mean anal sex). You can turn on the TV and see an old woman talk about vibrators and oral sex and stuff, so why not in a classroom, where students can actually ask questions and discuss the stuff?

Of course, America is a bit too puritan for that. Puritan in regard to teaching sex to kids, though not with anything else. But ideally, wouldn't it be good to teach people to have sex instead of just letting them figure it all out for themselves?

You're missing the contradictory nature of sex-ed in America. American schools feel compelled to teach sex-ed simply because they KNOW eventually most of the kids there are going to have sex, if they haven't already. So they feel the kids need to be educated on it at least a little so they know how to protect themselves from the risks involved.

The contradiction is, while the educators know most of the kids will have sex, they don't want them to. To MY mind, sex-ed is more a course on how scary sex can be than anything else. Take a look at what those courses focus on: pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, hygiene (feminine or otherwise), prevention... That, combined with the ultra-PC diagrams and clinical detachment of the educators, all comes together to point to one conclusion: abstinence, especially for teenagers, is the best solution to it all. Adults want teenagers to be educated, yet they also want them to refrain from having sex at all.

So, if you think about it from that perspective, would it make sense for teachers to show porn of any kind in schools? Of course not! That would ENCOURAGE teenagers to have sex, not keep them on the straight and narrow. We want these kids to eat corn flakes and get good grades, not have sex. Teaching them new and unusual techniques to try with one another is right out. They wouldn't want to open Pandora's Box right in the classroom and have outraged parents blaming them for encouraging their children to perform fellatio to lower the risk of pregnancy.

Sun is right sex ed isnt about teaching kids how to have sex. The u.s (i'm guessing thats where your from and the schools your talking about) are very anti sex. I really wouldn't care if my kid watches porno or not I can see that it would teach him/her things. But the schools want to make having sex harder for kids so they wont have it. Lets just think before your first time you were incredibly worried about what was gonna go down. I was it kept me from doing it for a while so they got what they want from me I suppose.

Ok sum up here what the gov want's is for kids to not have sex till their married out of some out dated religious shit that controls peoples opinions on the matter. Sex ed isn't about teaching how to have sex but why you shouldn't have sex.

Everything I've learned has technically been in school, but from friends. I remember back in middle school when my one friend called my other friend (jokingly) because she said that one girl looked pretty cute a carpet muncher, and I had no idea what one was. I also learned what 69 meant.

School isn't to educate you with sex, it's job is to academically prepare you for a good career, not how to get freaky in bed.

If I were a parent, I would -not- be okay with a school system doing that. I think I speak for all that children find out fine on their own. They don't need encouragement.

I would rather have my child know the causes and effects of sex, pregnancy, STD's, etc versus knowing how many positions you can do it in sex. Everybody finds that out on their own.

Why not both?

Teach safety and proper methodology in Sex Ed, and teach risks and diseases in Health.

Best of both worlds.

However, while this may be a generalization, I feel this point has to be made: I've noticed that Males and Females have rather differing viewpoints on this.

I, and I'm noticing a lot of other male members, are either expressively for this, or in support. On the other hand, Ziggy, the only female member to have replied, is rather against it.

OK, so that's an unfair demographic. Work with me here.

It seems to me that the female opinion falls into line with the "(Over)Protective Mother" ideology, where you stick your head in the sand about how life actually works, and get to work crafting some rosy colored glasses for your kids that invariably are knocked off by a punch, a differing set of genitals, or a strong breeze.

On the other hand, the male opinion is either "I do not give a fuck", or "Sure, why not? Builds character", or something along those lines.

So, in that light, I think I can sort of rationalize my initially intended response.

So, putting that foot forward,



Another shining example of how school does nothing to prepare you for life. I honestly think that Slang should be offered as a credible foreign language course.



School is there to educate you on life. Supposedly. Sex is a big part of life. Therefore, Sex should be taught. It'll save you those "First Night Virgin" memories years down the line.



You hate children, dontcha?

I rather like that style of logic. "They find out well on their own" indeed. Problem is, a lot of them screw up or get hurt along the way. In my eyes, it's like saying "Lets not tell kids fire burns. Let them find out for themselves".



OR, we could teach them both, and save face?

It's a fact that in the u.s over 45% of sutdents grades 9-12 have had sex. Of that 14% say that they have had 4 or more sexual partners. Do we really need to be teaching kid's that sex is an everyday thing to do with anyone they meet. Right now the schools opinion on sex is that it's dangerous and kid's should beware. If we suddenly start saying hey sex is bad but here's how to fuck doggie style. You really think that number of kid's haveing sex will change for the better. While I don't have a problem with sex. When I was in highschool I knew about 10 kids out of a 1000 that had the maturity to have sex. Yet 700 of that 1000 were having sex. I can't speak for everyone but all highschoolers I meet are definitly not ready to be fucking 4 to 5 people before there even 18.

But don't misunderstand me if the kid's really ready to have sex I say let them. But the media has a strangle hold on the topic of sex telling kid's that they need to have it to be cool. This should not be the case I belive kid's should be kid's as long as they can putting more images into their heads about sex can't lead to anything good.

this^
exactly what i was gonna say. i never had sex ed. what schools and where do/did you guys go to?

edit:
and yeah shaggy. i'm gonna do the same thing that you say; i'm gonna show my kid some porn besause no matter what they teacher you in class, the real shit is always better 8)

Every pussy rubbing technique and fuck position has been indoctrinated in me from porn(especially hentai; Titty licking FTW). If I fuck a virgin, at least one of us will know how to get the party started.

I'm all for that porn to the kid shit. Fuck all that birds and bees sex talk shit; whatever the hell that talks about.(Never heard it, never want to hear it)

It wouldn't be about lowering the number of kids having sex, but about teaching kids how to do things properly. And if I was in charge of it, I certainly would not let any ideas about sex be taught in the classroom, whether it's "Sex is bad and you shouldn't do it unless you're married" or "Sex is great and you should do it all the time!" Teaching how to have sex isn't condoning casual sex. It's up to the kids to decide that for themselves, based on the truth and whatever personal morals they have.

It's just that it's glaringly obvious that the whole "Sex is bad" shit doesn't work. It's a bold-faced lie, and few kids care about it. The teenager years are all about rebellion, after all, and having sex is the easiest way to rebel when every adult says that you shouldn't have sex. All that does is make kids worried about having sex, afraid of what might happen. Like that, some kids may be afraid to have sex at all. Some 25-year-old virgin may get a hooker and lose his virginity to her because he's too afraid to fuck the girl that he likes, because he doesn't know what to do. Though that sounds like the plot of a movie (actually, I think it is a plot point of several movies), there's some truth in it. When I lost my virginity, I was very nervous that I wouldn't be good and she'd hate it, and I watched tons of porn. I knew what to do. I can only imagine how horrible a guy who never watched porn and didn't know what to do would feel.

@ShaggyJebus: I'm thinking the issue at heart is that sex ed should teach students how to have sex - can you imagine the implications and consequences behind that?

@Sunquan: I agree with your first paragraph, but depending on where you go to, some schools teach students about contraceptives and how to use them. Not all schools are, "Abstinence is the best that's ever happened," but I can see where you're coming from in that sex ed seems to tell the moral of, "Do not have sex." It's the same thing that they do with drugs - basically don't do drugs because x, y, and z will happen to you.

@Arizth: I don't think school prepares anybody at all for life. There are so many things that can't be taught from textbooks, but the same could also be said that without school, civilization couldn't technologically advance either. Sex is just one of those things they don't teach you about.

I don't think I'm being unrealistic and being an 'overbearing mom.' You're teaching minors how to have sex. Care to explain to the government why today's lesson in class is the spread eagle?

Sites don't even legally allow minors to watch porn. They make it very explicit that you agree to be over the age of 18. Sure it's easy to put in a fake birth year, but they legally have their asses covered, and if you were caught for some reason - that's on you, not them.

Let's go with 'it's just an age, why should that matter?'
Kids in high school, hell most early adults aren't mature enough or capable of handling another child. There's consequences to sex, and if you promote it then you're giving them an excuse to have sex.
If I were to get pregnant, right now, at age 19 - I would not be able to fully take care of it without jeopardizing my future. I have 7 more years of college to look at.

Kids without the Monty Python experience already don't take health class seriously with all the STD preventions and birth control - what are they going to do when they learn how to flick a clit with their tongue just right? Or leaning to the left when thrusting in a girl feels really good for her?





School didn't prepare me for life, but what school did do for me was prepare me for college. School is not supposed to do everything a parent should do.

A lot of my character and preparation for life came from my mother who raised me on her own. She taught me responsibility, to be independent, she taught me that you can be happy even when times are hard, etc. She's the one who showed me how to be an adult - how to prepare me for life. That's something a school can't do. That's something a child spends 18+ years on watching and observing from their parents and earning themselves.

Have a shitty parent and hate them? Fine, you learned from them by watching and observing what you weren't going to do with your life.





Oh please, your argument to have sex taught by a public schooling system is so you won't have an awkward first time? Since when is watching going to make you a pro in bed the first time? Most people watch porn before they have sex already and still are awkward.





That's not even a substantial argument.



People get hurt because of relationships, not because of sex. Sex can be a offbranch as to why they'd get hurt. Maybe someone cheated on the other. But relationship/love/rejection is what hurts more then sex.

You can't tell me that educating children on how to do sex positions will help them not get hurt in the future.





No, there's too much against it and it'll never happen. You know how many pedophiles will jump into school to get their teaching degree so they can show little Susie how to give a blow job for extra credit? Just no.

How about this? They have sex workshop classes for 30-year-olds. Why not have them for 17-year-olds? Both age groups have sex, and people in both age groups do want to have sex without having children.

Speaking of that, how does teaching teenagers the right way to have sex equate to telling teenagers to get pregnant? If one honestly believes that showing kids how to fuck will lead to more teen pregnancy, then doesn't one have to also believe that showing kids how to put on condoms will lead to more teen pregnancy? What's the difference between teaching how to have safe sex and teaching how to have good safe sex?

As for school not teaching enough about life, I agree that it doesn't, but shouldn't it? Wouldn't it be better if schools taught more about life? After all, kids spend more time at school than with their parents, and usually, schools know more about subjects than the parents do. That's why sex ed exists in the first place. Same with driver's ed and home ec. If a school can teach Billy how to bake a cake, why can't it teach him how to lick a pussy?

What if all this talk were about college, instead of high school? Would everything then be okay, because the kids are legal adults? What if I wasn't talking about the US and was instead talking about England, where the legal age for sex is 16? I'm not sure about the rules across the pond, if 16-year-olds can legally look at porn in England, but I know they can legally have sex, so why wouldn't it be possible to teach them about sex at 16?

Bottom line, why I made this thread - in middle school, I was taught how sperm moves, that STDs are bad, what genitals with horrible conditions look like, etc. In all those classes, I never saw what a real vagina looked like. Freshmen year of high school, I took a Health/Medicine course for kicks, and the book for that class (which didn't really talk about sex at all) showed me what a vagina looked like, in a chapter about how to clean the genitalia of patients. Isn't that a fucking shame? Hours were spent in sex ed learning about bad shit, and I not once saw what actual genitalia looked like. But five minutes of flipping through a medical book, and bam!

If they can show what a pussy with syphilis or giant warts looks like, why can't they show what a regular pussy looks like? It's like showing girls only dicks that are a foot and a half long, making them think, "Something that huge is going to be inside me for the rest of my life?"

Also, fuck parents. If the parents were doing things the right way, they wouldn't care if their 16-year-old saw a vagina that wasn't diseased. The parents would have already shown the kid what a real vagina looked like and taught him what sex was all about. I do think that the parents should be the ones to talk to kids about sex, but parents seem to never want to do that. That's why sex ed exists in the first place, isn't it?

This entire thread reeks of half formed ideas. Just because the other people posting in this thread don't have the patience to deal with your very shallow perspective doesn't mean that they agree with you. To be honest, I have no idea where you got the idea that everyone is siding with you and shaggy, because out of everyone who has posted only one person directly agreed with shaggy. All anyone else said was that yes, porn taught them about sex - but saying that porn taught you about sex and saying you want schools to teach porn are two very different things.

I mean after all, when we cut the bullshit, that’s what you are really proposing. You are saying they should teach the kids how to have sex - how exactly were you thinking they should do this? Should they write textbooks about it? Or maybe they will just pick a couple pornos and have the teacher do a scene by scene commentary on them?

I hope this sounds as ludicrous to you as it does to me.



The point of school is to teach people things. More specifically, children learn the things that they won't learn elsewhere in school. They learn geometry and biology. They learn chemistry. Why would you teach kids slang? Do they need help learning slang? Is this something they don't already know? Do you really think that if they offered slang -assuming it wasn't terribly outdated and misrepresented (which it would be) - every kid wouldn't get an A? Why would you teach something the kids already know?

The reason they teach kids about STDs and safe sex is because these aren't things they are likely to talk excitedly about during lunch. Kids will learn all about sex because they want to. They will go home and do 'research' on it (lol). They will spend hours thinking about it - but they aren't likely to ever look up information on STDs. The real point of school is to teach kids what they don't want to learn, because really they will pick everything else up extremely quickly.

Also I should note that trying to disregard ziggy's opinion because she is female comes of as very dirty and underhanded to me. Claiming demographics is bullshit, because you and I (and everyone else) knows that you can't call one persons view a demographic. The fact that you even tried just illustrates the half formed thought process that is prevalent in this entire thread.



[sarcasm]
That sounds like a great idea. Yea, they are responsible and mature kids, they can decide for themselves. I'm sure they have fully developed morals and know how to make smart decisions about their futures - I mean, growing up is really just more of a formality anyway right? I know lots of 15 year olds that are ready to make all their own decisions.
[/sarcasm]

But really? Why have parents at all? I don't suppose they are there to make important decisions for you?

When it comes down to it, you may not like it that your parents had so much say, but kids really aren't ready to be making the sort of decisions you are talking about.