When is it okay to cry?

I noticed something about society and that is for some reason crying in public isn't exactly accepted in the way I expected it to be. There is a possibility I don't know what I'm talking about I but I experienced it myself first hand today.
My dad is in the hospital and will stay overnight. Nothing serious, just a concussion and a slight cut on his head from some idiot behind him pushing the gas instead of the breaks at a red light. He'll be fine.

But when he called me explaining what happened, I was at A Mexican place with Lemon and Lime, there were plenty of tables filled, and I just started crying face first on my hands, slouching on the table, because I was worried and I might have lost my dad just then if the accident was worse. (But again, he'll be fine. I don't need everyone saying "hope your dad gets well soon")

Of course my friends were trying to comfort me but as I looked around I got these odd looks, and I think one of them even rolled their eyes. I felt embarrassed probably because I sorta made a scene in public, so I regained my posture and just held my sadness in until I got home, but at that point i didn't feel like crying much anymore.

I suppose it's not okay to cry and sob and stuff in public for some reason, so I'd like to know when you think it is the appropriate time or place to cry if you feel really sad about something and need to let it out.

To start, I'm sorry to hear about what happened to your father, I hope he will be ok, and I hope you are ok and feeling better.

To your question, it's a number of somewhat complicated reasons, most of which I probably understand little about. But I'd say the most significant is that people don't want to feel obligated to care about strangers. A, "it isn't my responsibility to care for someone I don't know", but the act of crying induces feelings of concern and worry, just as the sight of injury would. Many people wish to produce walls between each other, and such acts should only be displayed if that wall doesn't exist between you and the person.

I'm not sure how or when, but at some point, people started regarding the act as a sign of weakness. Creating expectations for people to never cry, especially in public. It became more extreme for the male sex, for what I could only assume, a belief that men need to be physically and emotionally strong.

Unfortunately, this is a deeply seeded perception in society spread witlessly.

When is it ok?... I'm not sure... I'd say, in a safe environment with friends, family, and possibly professionals (I'm not too fond of counselors, but that's a personal hangup). You should do it with people who are willing to listen, not those who lecture you about how you should and shouldn't feel but instead talk with you and help you through your grief/sorrow. I won't say there's a "right and wrong" place, I don't believe that is the case, but I do find that people can make a place/time that could be used into a hostile environment, and this is very unfortunate.

I hope this helped at least a little.

I guess my answer is complicated. I cry a lot. When I'm pissed, frustrated, depressed, or just if I haven't cried in a while. When I cry, I don't do it publicly, at work I would excuse myself and compose in the bathroom. If I'm having an intimate discussion about sad stuff with a family member or friend, I'll cry but I'm comfortable with them. I feel like crying publicly is seen as a weakness or seen as being dramatic, and if I was eating at a restaurant and I saw an adult wailing, I'd probably give a stink face. But if someone was silently crying and being comforted I wouldn't give it a second glance. I'm not sure if this gave you insight or not, but that's how I feel about crying.

I think it's considered more acceptable for women to cry in public compared to a man crying in public. Men are often taught that they aren't supposed to cry around others since it threatens their masculinity. Maybe that's one reason why people would roll their eyes and such if they see a guy cry. As for women crying in public, I don't think society is as harsh or judgemental.

Personally, I don't care who cries or what gender they are. I think that if there is a reason to cry, then crying is fine. Things happen regardless of the time or place, so there is no acceptable or unacceptable time to cry. What I can't stand though, is when babies and little children cry. They usually cry for any little thing that they can complain about, like if someone ate their last cookie or some stupid reason like that. I don't think reasons that insignificant are worth crying about, but children will be children.

I don't hold myself to the same standards though, maybe because I'm a man. It's not ok for me if I cry, which is why I've gotten so good at holding it in. I don't want the attention that crying would draw to myself, plus my body goes numb and it gets hard to breathe when I do. What makes things worse is that I only cry when I'm uncontrollably angry. I don't know how to express myself properly, so I go off like a bomb when my emotions become too difficult to control. I'm sure that I'd look like a lunatic to anyone who sees me cry, even I think I look like a lunatic when that happens.

When you are feeling sad and depressed. No, seriously, it is better to let it out rather keeping it all inside. At the very, it could help to relieve your stress, and relieving your stress is never a bad thing.

I cried a lot when I was a kid, as stupid as they were I had my reasons. Of course, this attracted lots of ridicule since a boy 'crying like a girl' is bound to attract lots of teasing and negative impressions.

Nowadays, if I cry, I do it alone, I don't feel at ease doing so in front of anyone anymore. Last time I did so, it came out of nowhere after reading an admittedly sad visual novel, and the moment my mother asked me what was wrong and I told her, she looked at me like I was some dumb child. I'll never forget nor forgive that.

...personal issues aside, I think it's best to let it out instead of bottling up stuff inside until it bursts out without control (which is what happens to me and no, I don't recommend it). Of course, it's better if it's somewhere where one can feel safe since they'll be caught in a moment of weakness and vulnerability, but sometimes even doing so in public is worth it if it'll make one feel better.

Well, I think the right time to cry is when yer all alone, in yer room, cuddling yer favorite stuffed animal.



CRY BEITCH, CRY IT ALL OUT..

When you're faced with unbearable sadness or when your loved ones have had a seriously close shave.

I'd never cry in public but I drown myself when I'm alone in my room and tragedy strikes me unaware.

Honestly just cry when you have to. No sense in bottling it up and having it eat away at you.

Every person has a different emotional/sensitivity level and sometimes you just have to let it out. I don't think it's healthy to cry about every little thing in life, but with what you went through it's normal to get upset. I know when my dad went into the hospital for the first/second time in relation to his heart condition, I was bawling like a baby either at school or at the mall. Some people looked concerned, others gave me odd glances, but don't let other people get you too conscious.

I guess for me I am one where I prefer to cry in the privacy of my own home or somewhere secluded where no one feels they have to ask me if I am okay. I'm more of a private person with such matters and I try my best to just hold it in until I can find somewhere where I can let off steam without judgement.

The times I do cry in public I don't really care if other's see (though I do feel slightly embarrassed), since I can't help it when it happens.

I guess to sum all of my randomness up; just take life day by day and if you need to cry just do it and don't give two shits about other's. If you are somewhere where quiet is encouraged (library or movie theater) go to the rest room or somewhere and calm down. Don't keep it bottled up and feel like you have to "be a man" about things. Never really liked that saying since crying isn't something to be ashamed of.

It's nice to see different opinions on such a strong subject.

I dunno, the women in my family cry very often (for very trivial reasons. and im not exaggerating, because it happens every month........).

I myself cry (or let tears shed) in only two circumstances:

1) When I am extremely pissed. I get teary eyed when ever i am really annoyed but cant do anything about it, and

2) when i yawn. i always have tears flowing down my face after yawning several times.


I believe it is ok to cry whenever, as long as you don't purposely make a scene.

You only ask the question if you are worried about public perception. To me if you feel the need to cry then cry. People will either roll their eyes, move along, or ask whats wrong. In the end not something to do with them.

Now don't cry when the convenience store is out of your favorite item. Cry when you feel the need, but if it is something trivial then might want to hold those tears in unless you don't want people's stares.

I myself rarely cry around people at all. Might get a tear cause of pain, but otherwise never like to let my friends see me in a weakened state. Like when my friend at work was shot and killed, I put a strong face on and then drive home and in bed cried.

I never cry in public. This is because it's my problem and I don't want to disrupt other people or have to worry about explaining why I am crying. I guess, I just try to be considerate of others. On the other hand, if I saw someone crying in public, I wouldn't be bothered by it. I would just be concerned for them.

Overall, I think its better to cry in a private place but if you can't hold it in then just let it out. You shouldn't let feelings get bottled up.

It should always be ok to cry let it all out :)

Crying is driven by human emotion, to deny it would make you inhuman to a certain degree.

Even though crying is pointless on a survival level, it feels good and provides an outlet for stress and pressure in our lives. I actually cry on a fairly frequent basis, and it feels good after you finish

Oh vey. Reminds me when I cried in the car. Boy, I looked like a bitch. Felt good though. But, it's hard to stop though with a one in a century cry.

How is it pointless on a survival level if it feels good and provides an outlet for stress??

Sounds pretty good thing for 'survival'.

One of those resort elevator dreams I had was about that actually. An exact replica of me if I were sad, depressed, and probably suicidal came up to me in the elevator and wanted me to kill her in the most i humane way possible.
She didn't want to "get in my way anymore" but I didn't kill her like she wanted. I hugged her. It didn't cheer her up as she still ran off crying down the hall nonce she got to her floor, but I know it did something.

As much as I hate sadness I wouldn't give it up for the exact reason you mentioned. It would mean giving up a part if my humanity.

I don't cry because of past bullying and general societal pressure that "boys/men don't cry". I used to be insecure about such things. I no longer have such issues, but also haven't "regained" the "ability" to cry, and don't think I'd care to.

I don't like to see people cry, but I would never tell anyone who felt they needed to cry to keep it in. Hell, I'm probably going to have to see it in my future job, and it's probably going to suck... guess I'll just have to grin and bear it, it will be worth it.

So basically, it's okay to cry whenever you feel you need to. As long as it's not just to get your way/about completely trivial things all the time.