leonard267 Posts

May I know what you mean by 'good side' and 'bad side'? I presume you are talking about the warring factions in that civil war? Would also like to know what era is that set in.

I don't do stories, opting for monologues or essays because the only character is myself. I suppose if I tried doing stories, it would be most likely satirical in nature, based on things I see and hear rather than conjured up with my imagination.

So, my advice is to read the works of others, flip through history books and study events that are more often than not steered by personalities and get your hands on any material that depicts events and people.

Also, I am almost convinced that creativity is well concealed plagiarism.
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/10084068/Rudyard-Kipling-letter-admits-plagiarising-parts-of-the-Law-of-the-Jungle.html

That said, what ideas do you have? Care to share?

Not to worry. The deadline is tentative. I intend to extend the deadline by one more week.

ED: Deadline is at 11th August 2014 Monday.

I think you can the Choose Your Own Adventure game your event entry. If you can, can you try changing the title of your thread? Sorry for not participating.

Not to worry. If you wish to fall asleep again, feel free to help yourself to the contents of whatever is written here!

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Summary of the contents of the diary:

1. Threw an object, hit the old man. The old man was either unconscious or dead, either way, his limp body is used as a scarecrow.

2. Herds of cows and aliens from outer space paid obeisance to that scarecrow of a unconscious body before abducting it and leaving a toilet in its place.

3. The toilet transforms, so he claims, into his fiancée who masochistically obliges to engage in some hanky-panky with the farmer.

4. Many other onlookers looked on for what they saw was two persons flailing on the ground like beached fish. They appeared to be pleasuring themselves at the sight of it though the farmer claimed that they do not possess reproductive organs.

5. He made mention about the size of his manhood and his virility. He claimed that his manhood was so large that it caused aeroplanes to crash, bombs to detonate and botched military exercises.

The day started with the farmer cleaning his face with sulphuric acid and 'wiping his chainsaw' using his pants. After this seemingly everyday routine (if one were to look past the acid and the chainsaw), he started his exercise of throwing discuses (bizarrely described as love toys in his diary) out of the attap house which he called his abode. Partaking in such an activity carried risks, not least that of causing a nuisance and possible bodily harm.

Sure enough, on that very day, an accident happened when his poor grandfather, the owner of the farm, was hit by one of the projectiles from the farmer's abode. Regrettably, that ancient man died because of that. It was not so much the bodily injury but the shock of being hit that took the poor dotard's life. Though the farmer knew it not, he was now the owner, albeit a crazed one, of the farm.

Far away from the hustle and bustle of the sprawling concrete jungles of the modern urban cities of the former Dutch East Indies and safely nestled in the peace and tranquility that is the strange and exotic countryside lived a farmer who looked unobtrusive and rather unassuming.

His job was tend to plant the seedlings, tend to the crops, reap the harvest and sell it to whoever who wish to purchase the harvest under the supervision of his ancient and near-decrepit grandfather who owned the farm he was working at. As circumstances would have it, he was poised to inherit his grandfather's mantle as owner of that farm. However, in recent years thanks to innovations in farming technology and the inability of his grandfather to keep up with the times, the farm encountered financial problems.

Driven to desperation, the farmer's grandfather decided to grow crops that would fetch a high price in the black market, a rather euphemistic way to say that those crops are raw materials for mind altering substances. For those who don't get it, in recent years, our hero is made to plant dope. It was of course not without consequence. While what happened to that farmer was exactly unknown, as the days went by, it became more and more obvious that he was losing his senses.

Yet, he managed to keep a diary of sorts of which he named "Doki Doki Suru". The title of that diary was a language alien to his native land which meant feelings of nervousness, anxiety or dread. At first glance, it made little to no sense with fantastic scenarios being fleshed out in grisly detail. Ironically, the title of that diary was an apt description of the feelings of those who were made to re-read his diary.

Here is a summary of the contents of that diary on a certain date:

Agreed. I should harass him with by rewriting his highly acclaimed event entry!
https://www.fakku.net/forums/writing-and-fanfiction/halloween-2013-doki-doki-suru

Introduction to Doki Doki Suru:

Doki Doki Suru roughly translates from Japanese to mean the uneasy feelings brought about by dread or nervousness and often mistaken for the feelings of anticipation or excitement. Having read it myself, I feel that the title is ironically analogous to the feelings I have right now attempting to make sense out of it.

A mere glance through its text is potentially life changing, a testament to the power of the imagery this text evokes. Just the mere thought of it is enough to make my eyes water and my bowels and other muscles at the bottom end of my torso lose function. It is unbelievable that the story is set in the most humble of places nestled far away from the troubles of the world.

Doki Doki Suru is a story of a farmer and his encounters with love whilst toiling in the fields in the Dutch East Indies. Belying his unobtrusive exterior lies a man with extraordinary abilities that are beyond the realm of comprehension! It is indeed not an exaggeration to claim that this magnum opus of high_time's is mind blowing.

The rewrite of Doki Doki Suru aims to make this masterpiece more accessible to the masses due to its incomprehensible nature. I hope my good friend and author of Doki Doki Suru, high_time, would be appreciative of this effort. What on earth was I thinking offering to do this?!

It really depends on the material or whether there is anything to make fun of. Personally I am proud of the Mudslinging thread where I attempted to write a story based on the stories of others and there are things that can be made fun of.

In the bizarre event when I become a publisher and when you get yourself involved in MY interpretation of the Boring Boy.

Are you aware of the Writing Event? Would like it if you have something in mind to contribute.

That said, I told Shikinokami that A Young Man's Adventure is a lemon and it serves to arouse. I can't say anything much about lemons but I thought it served its purpose well. The whole purpose of what he calls coming up with a 'Gary Stu' is to imagine ourselves in his shoes.

What is wrong about a little bit of escapism and implausible scenarios so long as it is understood easily and there is a progressing plot? This is what this reader is thinking.

The novelisation of the Boring Boy is a possible candidate.

Dreadful. It almost happened to me a few times when I try to purchase a meal using my ATM card which doubles as a debit card. Fortunately the people at the counter are kind enough to tell me that my card is still with them. I think it is still a long way before we can go cashless. Perhaps someone should consider installing a tracking device on our cards.

I will see if I can come up something over the long weekend. I think I would be busy settling a report.

How is everything going? Smoothly I hope.

I suppose you have a character arc in mind, where that character would go through some experiences where he or she realises the message you wanted the story to convey as the story progresses.

Don't worry about this entry not having any message. Rebecca and the others who appear in the story may not strike me as complex characters and the story overall may not be subtle but I really enjoyed how straightforward and implausible the entry is.

I stand by what I said to high_time. You are becoming one of my favourite contributors on this site.

I am interested to know what your thoughts were and what was the inspiration behind the story. I am convinced that the story is not to taken too seriously. I wonder if that was what you intended.

I will start work on it if I have the time. I need to settle a report first though. Good thing that this weekend will be a long weekend. I think the same goes for you too isn't it?

That said, I have sent you a PM about DatYuriThough. She is becoming one of my favourite writers on the site, you among them of course.

It seems as if I cannot agree with d on anything!

Rogue Heroine does feel like The Children of Lux in the way that it is written, easy to understand and follow, and ought not to be taken too seriously. Both these stories feel like cartoons aimed at teenagers or an action film. There is really no real need to demand realism from stories like these. The appeal of your work I thought, and I say that as a compliment, is that it is simple, surreal and entertainingly so.

Let me enclose the parts I liked in a spoiler:



In a more complex and realistic story, Rebecca would have to use stealth and cunning to sabotage ships and assassinate Gilbert even though she is more powerful than any ordinary human. I imagine her going on very dangerous missions at the behest of the Chains of Peace who held her sister hostage. The non Mark 2's might attempt to coerce her to join them perhaps by suggesting that her sister is dead, bribe her with money, set a male equivalent of a honey trap to entice her, so on and so for, all part and parcel of espionage since the dawn of time.

I much prefer what you have done here though because you are one of the few writers who comes up with elaborate scenarios and yet tell the story in a surreal, albeit simple and enjoyable way. (I am unable do that.) I am quite sure you were aware yourself that your stories had some element of levity never mind that it appears dark and dangerous.

The prologue makes more sense than that of A Game of Thrones and it is definitely easier to follow. Why can't stories these days be told simply and be simple? I look forward to the day when you are the screenwriter for an action movie or an anime.

What does AoC stand for though?

There are ways to put in exposition without the interrupting the flow or pace or how the story reads. I think the Lord of the Rings did that very well. Although it did occur to me that you might dislike the LOTR prologue and the "Shadow of the Past".



The Lord of the Rings prologue is a huge info-dump that resembles an encyclopedia entry or a textbook chapter. I liked it very much and consider it a proper prologue. The first chapter "A Long Expected Party" made sense all the more thanks to it. The next info-dump is "The Shadow of The Past" where Gandalf tells Frodo the history of the Ring. Gandalf did an effective monologue with little to no interruption from Frodo.

As for how the prologue could have been better, for me, it is quite simple. Go into third person exposition for the prologue instead of using it to describe the scenery (I know you made it clear that you hated that style of writing),

"The continent enjoyed an uneasy peace after Robert the Kingslayer usurped the throne from the mad King... The story begins at the northernmost frontiers of the continent at the Wall which kept the Seven Kingdoms safe from The Wildlings..."

To quote SparksNotes:

"Three men of the Night’s Watch, Waymar, Will, and Gared, were in search for a small group of wildlings, uncivilized people who live north of the giant wall that protects the Seven Kingdoms."

It would definitely be a better read or make more sense than what I was presented. I think it is a matter of taste. You would find my suggestions jarring but I would find them very interesting because it is giving me information about an alien world.



Finding hints in the story, which are most likely embedded in some dialogue where each line is a fragmented sentence and you almost can't tell who is saying what, makes reading very difficult for this reader. And yes, you are right, for me, if I am confused, I wouldn't want to read any further. This is a shame though. The story looked very interesting from the summaries which I quite liked.

Person is mistaken. There is another Sneaky One.

Whatever happened to the other Sneaky One?