Things not to say during sex

'well that wasnt there before'

What the hell? Are you wearing a fucking apron?

"Now, go make me a sandwich."

It felt like I was lying on a sheet of ice.

Wait till the guys at school here abut this

"oops i came"

man: hey how bout we do a foursome?
women: .....ok
man and women: come on in!
two people walk in.
man: dad!?
woman: mom!?

Okay this is a scenario one

Your on the living room sofa both of you bare ass naked going at it like a couple of wild animals.

*Car Door Slams*

"What was that?"

"The neighbors"

*Key in lock sound*

"OH SHIT DADDY'S HOME!"

That's just wrongg..ickk.
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Fixed

"Who are you again?"

"well i think its time you get the fuck outta here"
"what?!"
"hmm is seems you don't understand, so let me go get my money and you can leave"
"asshole"
"oh and by the by i didn't put on a condom and i have herpes...so have fun"

"i hope you like herpes"

- Hey, babe, nice mustache.
- Ahhh.....enjoy your AIDS.
- Hmm...I could have sworn that I heard that you can do better than this...
- That's it? My mother does a better job than this...
- Guess what...this is MAD TV! *Lights turn on, people cheer*
- You're like an inexperienced criminal...sloppy.

...I'm not good at this. At all.

"once more around the park"

my friends done this one:

he's screwin a girl and he said "how does your friend look naked"

thats a legitimate question. i see nothing wrong with asking that

"HHHMMMMM Yeah, how does your little brother look naked?"

or

"HHHMMMMM Yeah, how does your son look naked?"

wtf :shock: