crazr wrote...
echoeagle3 wrote...
crazr wrote...
I have the same thoughts I had before. Raw and unpolished, but definitely loaded with potential. Overall, I think it's good. Character favoritism is kind of rampant and could use some more spreading, though. You favor Traydor and Ryomou the most, for example.
Lol, I don't have a character named Ryomou. Also, how far are you?
She looks like Ryomou, you love Ryomou, it's more fun to say Ryomou, therefore she is Ryomou, lol. Same as before but a little bit farther. I reread what I did and took a more loose stand on my usual stringent criticism. I've learned some new stuff since I've been away. Apparently, an actual college does that.
I gotta go real quick. Need to send this laptop into the shop.
well I wont deny that Isabelle was modeled after Ryomou lol.
Im likely going to do a major edit of the earlier parts of the story when i find the time to do it. Just so you know.
and yes, you learn things at college.